Danity Kane‘s Aubrey O’Day is opening up about her tumultuous relationship with Jersey Shore star Paul “DJ Pauly D” DelVecchio. In an EXCLUSIVE interview with HollywoodLife, she revealed their relationship — which lasted from 2015 to mid-2017 — was so so emotionally distressing that she escaped to a new country to find herself again. “I had to go to Bali. I had to heal. I had to get in a place that I’m comfortable in,” the 38-year-old “Damages” hitmaker confessed while promoting her new single, “Couple Goals”, which debuted on Nov. 21 via Instagram and a nude video on OnlyFans.
“And I have a wider perspective of everything. You know, I could take ownership accountability of, of why I stayed in something that was so toxic, why I, you know, why I tolerated what I did. I was suffering from like, you know, not loving myself properly,” Aubrey further explained. “And I had to take care of myself and grow and learn and evolve and get to a place where now I can release this,” she continued, referencing “Couple Goals”.
“And I’m solely just doing it for me, too, for my fans, and it’s about the art and it’s not about the guy,” the double platinum recording artist added. “The song and words are what I wrote in my diary at the time. I don’t belong to anybody but myself.”
While the song is named “Couple Goals”, the lyrics describe the opposite and tell the tale of a guy inspired by Pauly D who doesn’t actually care about the woman beside him. “Poor, poor girl, you think you’ve got the whole world, but he’s just giving you the same show, same story as before,” she sings, addressing the 42-year-old DJ and reality star’s new relationship.
Elaborating on the inspiration behind her lyrics, Aubrey claimed, “He was constantly cheating on me. I was dealing with it from the beginning. It was this gaslighting game. Too many lies and it was making me sick, tired, unhealthy, depleted, and I started comparing myself to women in every way. And that’s what girls do when they get cheated on.” She added, “It was a tiring exhausting life and I’m happy not living it anymore.”
Pauly D previously denied cheating allegations by his ex on his 2019 reality series, Double Shot at Love with DJ Pauly D & Vinny. “Yeah, I don’t do that whole cheating thing,” he told a contestant who brought up concerns that he doesn’t take relationships seriously. “It’s a waste of time.”
When he was pressured about cheating rumors with Aubrey specifically, he doubled down on his statement and called the idea of him cheating “crazy.” Responding to his suitors again, he firmly explained, “Our relationship was on and off on and off on and off. When we were off she did her thing. When I was off, I did my thing. I would never. No point. I don’t believe in that. I never cheated on any girlfriend I’ve had in my life.”
In her chat with HollywoodLife, Aubrey also revealed why she waited a few years to speak on her “traumatic” relationship with Pauly D and release music about the time in her life. “I believe that when you’re going through something traumatic, especially nowadays, with words being so powerful, you’re responsible for anything you say,” she articulately explained. “So, for me, I just really try to make sure that I don’t speak when I’m still emotional about something because, God forbid, I say something that I later regret, or I don’t speak with like, the highest levels of my integrity, and then I’m held to it.”
The former couple reportedly met on the set of Famously Single, an E! show that follows several celebrities who move into a house together to figure out their romantic problems and potentially find love again. The season aired in 2016. As a couple, Aubrey and Pauly D appeared on Season 11 of Marriage Bootcamp: Reality Stars.
As mentioned above, Pauly D gave himself another shot at love with his own reality dating show, Double Shot at Love with DJ Pauly D & Vinny, in which he starred opposite his Jersey Shore costar, Vinny Guadagnino. The show worked out for Pauly D, as that’s where he met his current girlfriend, Nikki Hall. Although they did not leave the first season of the show together, Nikki returned for Season 2 and stole Pauly’s heart.
That same year, Aubrey appeared on Ex on the Beach, a reality dating show that she said brought her “back to life” in a frank Instagram post. “After my last relationship with Pauly, it took so long for me to heal from the pain, anger, torture, & toxicity that I found love in with him,” she wrote while promoting the series.
As of this writing, Aubrey is single, but she seems to have a positive approach to relationships. In an April 7 Instagram post, for instance, she said that true love will come to those who set their intentions. “Love is intentional. It’s about choosing to be brave, vulnerable, and also communicative about your boundaries simultaneously. The purpose of intention is to grow, build trust, and deepen your relationships… intimacy,” she wrote alongside a bikini pic on a Bali beach. “Being intentional paves the way toward a natural progression to true and lasting Love.”