Johnny Depp Regrets Falling In Love With Amber Heard & Hopes His Lawsuit Delivers Redemption

Johnny Depp is 'desperate to repair his image' after firing off a defamation lawsuit against ex-wife Amber Heard, whom he feels 'completely used by.' The actor can't even compare their romance to past relationships.

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Johnny Depp, 55, is not reminiscing on fond memories of his time with ex-wife Amber Heard, 32, as he gears up for another legal battle with the Aquaman star. “Johnny feels completely used by Amber and he regrets ever falling in love with her,” a source close to the Pirates of the Caribbean star EXCLUSIVELY tells HollywoodLife. Depp documented some of these feelings in a $50 million defamation lawsuit, court documents of which HollywoodLife has obtained (you can scroll through them in our gallery above). The actor is anxious to see what will come next, after news broke on March 1 that he filed the lawsuit.

“Johnny hopes his suit delivers redemption for him as he feels like he has never been in a relationship which has cost him so much in his career and personal life,” our source reveals. And Depp has an extensive history of relationships, as he was married to makeup artist Lori Allison for two years (1983-1985), and got engaged to other women as time passed: Twin Peaks star Sherilyn Fenn, 54, Dirty Dancing star Jennifer Grey, 59, and Stranger Things actress Winona Ryder, 47. He also dated French musician Vanessa Paradis, 46, for 14 years (1998-2012), and the two share a daughter Lily-Rose Depp, 19, and son John Christopher Depp III, 16. Depp went on to marry Heard in Feb. 2015.

“[Depp] feels that Amber is totally out of line with every allegation she has ever made about him,” our source continues. Heard had accused Depp of verbally and physically abusing her during their marriage, and even obtained a temporary domestic violence restraining order against Depp that she filed for in May 2016, the month she also filed for a divorce. Depp denied all abuse allegations and the divorce was finalized on Jan. 13, 2017. But over a year later, Heard authored a Washington Post op-ed titled “I spoke up against sexual violence — and faced our culture’s wrath. That has to change,” which was published on Dec. 18, 2018. “It hurts Johnny because he had no idea how angry and vindictive Amber could be,” our source continues, adding, “Johnny feels desperate to repair his image. He is hoping this case will clear his name so that his fans and the studios will know that he is not the monster that Amber portrays him to be.”

Amber Heard and Johnny Depp pictured in Australia in April 2016, one month before Heard filed for divorce. (Shutterstock)

Although Depp was never specifically named in the essay, he is now suing Heard based on the allegation that her “op-ed depended on the central premise that Ms. Heard was a domestic abuse victim and that Mr. Depp perpetrated domestic violence against her,” according to the court documents that HollywoodLife read. These same documents accused Depp’s ex-wife of making “false allegations of domestic abuse” to “execute her hoax,” which was to allegedly “generate positive publicity for Ms. Heard and advance her career.”

Depp even flipped the abuse allegations onto Heard, as he accused the Justice League actress of throwing a glass vodka bottle in his direction — “one of many projectiles that she launched at him in this and other instance” — which allegedly shattered Depp’s middle finger and required it to be “surgically reattached,” according to Depp’s court documents. While Depp continues to deny all abuse allegations and is now accusing Heard of being the “perpetrator” of violence, the actress’s head attorney, Eric M. George, has already responded to Depp’s lawsuit in a statement obtained by Deadline: “This frivolous action is just the latest of Johnny Depp’s repeated efforts to silence Amber Heard. She will not be silenced. Mr. Depp’s actions prove he is unable to accept the truth of his ongoing abusive behavior. But while he appears hell-bent on achieving self destruction, we will prevail in defeating this groundless lawsuit and ending the continued vile harassment of my client by Mr. Depp and his legal team.”