It’s Ian’s last day of freedom before he heads to prison for two years, and he just wants to chill for the day. His siblings head out, with Lip being a sober companion for movie star Jen Wagner, played by Courteney Cox! When he shows up to watch her, she tries to leave the hotel without him. He chases after her and eventually tackles her. He threatens to tackle her again if she decides to run again. He can’t mess this gig up. He needs the money for Ian. Lip and Jen bond in the park, but she just keeps trying to drink. Lip brings her home for Ian’s last supper so she doesn’t try anything. She has an absolute blast and forgets all about drinking.
Ford and Fiona are looking for a new place. He’s ready to take their relationship to the next level. Even though the new apartment is way out of her price range, she agrees to sign a lease for Ford. Fiona meets with Max to get an update about the senior center, and he immediately asks for more money, specifically $25,000. She doesn’t expect that at all. She doesn’t have that kind of money. When she comes home, she sees that Ford has already packed their stuff. She starts to back out of the new apartment, pissing Ford off something fierce.
At the exact moment Kev and V are about to get it on, Sister Frances knocks on their door. Amy brought a dildo to school. They have to go speak to the priest so Amy (okay, both of the girls) doesn’t get kicked out. Bob Saget plays the priest, and he sets Kev and V straight. They decide to throw all their sex toys in the river. The anal beads are the hardest for them to part with.
The woman, Ingrid Jones, who attacked Frank at the hospital has him smitten. He waits for Ingrid’s psych hold to be over with Liam. When she walks out of the hospital, she acts like she doesn’t know him. He ditches Liam and goes to Ingrid’s house to tell her that he likes the crazy parts of her.
Fiona tries to get out of the senior care center deal, but she still owes the $25,000. She doesn’t qualify for another loan. She’s desperate for money and drowns her sorrows in booze. One of the employees at Patsy’s, played by Casper Smart, comforts her. He kisses her, but she stops him before things go too far. Fiona goes home and Ford isn’t there. She locates his iPhone and finds his truck parked at a house. When she knocks, a woman named Patty comes to the door. Patty was never Ford’s mother, she’s his wife. He also has a kid! Ford claims they’re separated, but Fiona is furious.
Fiona is blindsided by Ford’s betrayal. She gets into a car accident after leaving Ford’s house. He runs after her, but she bails on the car. Oh, Fiona. Don’t leave the scene of a crime. You know better. The next morning, Fiona is a no show to take Ian to prison. No one has heard from her. Kev drives Ian to prison, along with the rest of the Gallagher clan — Lip, Carl, Debbie, Liam, and V. They all share one last Gallagher group hug.
When Ian looks over at Lip, they both have tears in their eyes. “Thanks for being my brother,” he says to Lip, who replies, “I never had a choice.” This is Shameless at its best. At the core of this crazy show is family. Ian heads inside and walks into his cell. He’s never felt more alone than he does right now. But that all changes when his cellmate walks in, and he’s none other than MICKEY FREAKING MILKOVICH. (My bad, totally wrote Mickey Gallavich earlier because I was so excited. No disrespect to the Milkovich family.) “Holy f**k,” Ian says, putting into words what the entire Gallavich fandom is thinking right now. Ian walks over to Mickey’s bunk and kisses Mickey with so much passion. This Gallavich endgame is the best thing to happen to TV all year. With Cameron Monaghan leaving the show, what an incredible episode to send him off with.