Two days after thanking wife Hailey Baldwin on Instagram for “being such a huge support in my life,” Justin Bieber posted another, deeply emotional message, explaining to his fans when he’s been going through over the past few years. The “What Do You Mean?” singer, now 25, revealed that he started doing “heavy drugs” when he was 19 years old, and that it made him become “resentful, disrespectful to women, and angry.” He said that he also “abused all of my relationships.” He did not name names, though at 19, he was linked to Selena Gomez. “I became distant to everyone who loved me, and I was hiding behind, a shell of a person that I had become. I felt like I could never turn it around,” he wrote.
Justin wrote that becoming famous at 13, an unstable household, and having “access to whatever I wanted” led to his drug abuse, and affected him mentally, as well. He suffered from a deep depression, the “Where Are Ü Now” singer revealed in his post. “It’s hard to get out of bed in the morning with the right attitude when you are overwhelmed with your life, your past, job, responsibilities, emotions, your family, finances, your relationships. When it feels like there’s trouble after trouble after trouble. You star foreseeing the day through lenses of ‘dread’ and anticipate another bad day… Sometimes it can even get to the point where you don’t even want to live anymore. Where you feel like it’s never going to change. I fully sympathize with you.”
His depression worsened as he grew older. “Everyone did everything for me, so I never even learned the fundamentals of responsibility,” he wrote. “By this point, I was 18 with no skills in the real world, with millions of dollars and access to whatever I wanted. This is a very scary concept for anyone. By 20, I made every bad decision you could have thought of and went from one of the most loved and adored people in the world to the most ridiculed, judged, and hated person in the world.”
Justin ended his passionate letter by praising Hailey, 22, his wife of one year. “It’s taken me years to bounce back from all these terrible decisions, fix broken relationships, and change relationship habits,” Justin wrote. “Luckily, God blessed me with extraordinary people who love me for me. Now, I am navigating the best season of my life — ‘MARRIAGE’!! Which is an amazing, crazy new responsibility. You learn patience, trust, commitment, kindness, humility, and all the things it takes to be a good man.”
His friends and fans rooted him on in the comments. His manager, Ryan Good, wrote, “Love you for life. Proud of you.” Scooter Braun also said he was proud, and “Summertime” singer Cody Simpson wrote, “Love seeing this so much man! Wow.” Sean Kingston sent love to his friend, writing, “Wow thank u for the testimony.. I sure needed this 🙌🙌 God bless u forever my lil brother 🙌💚.”