Kal Penn’s Fiancé Josh: Everything To Know About Their 12-Year Relationship

Kal Penn is known for a successful acting career and for being an active political figure. Here’s what to know about his longtime partner and current fiancé Josh.

• Josh is the actor’s fiancé.
• The former Obama White House staffer has never disclosed a last name for his life partner.
• Kal has been extremely private about the most important relationship in his life.

Kal Penn has been with his partner Josh since 2010, and they’ve been engaged more recently. But the political activist and American Horror Story actor, 45, revealed to PEOPLE Magazine last year while discussing his book, You Can’t Be Serious, that he’s only recently discovered his own sexuality. “I discovered my own sexuality relatively late in life compared to many other people,” he said. “There’s no timeline on this stuff. People figure their s— out at different times in their lives, so I’m glad I did when I did.” Learn more about Kal and his long history with Josh below!

Josh & Kal are engaged.

It’s not known for exactly how long, but while Kal was promoting his book in October 2021, he revealed that he is engaged to Josh. “Obviously I am engaged to a man and our families will be there for the wedding,” he told PEOPLE. “The big disagreement now is whether it’s a huge wedding or a tiny wedding. I want the big a** Indian wedding. Josh hates attention, [has said], ‘Or we could just do quick 20-minute thing with our families and that’s it.’ So we have to meet halfway in the middle.”

They go all the way back to 2010.

While Kal’s announcement was relatively new, the relationship most certainly is not. Per Parade, Kal met Josh when he was working for former President Barack Obama while he was in office. And during an appearance on CBS Sunday Morning in 2021, he reportedly said that he was celebrating his 11th anniversary in October — meaning they’ve been together since, or at least met, in October of 2010.

“I mean, you know, Josh and I’ve been together for 11 years,” he said. “We had our 11th anniversary in October. So, for me and writing about it, I think the tricky thing was, you’re right, it’s very matter-of-fact in our lives, and when you’re the son of Indian immigrants who says that you want to be an actor, the chaos that that creates in your family and your community, will trump anything else, always.”

Kal is extremely private about Josh.

During his expansive PEOPLE interview, Kal opened up — just a little — about why he’s so private about his longtime love. And he hinted that it’s out of respect for his fiancé’s sensibilities. “I’ve always been very public with everybody I’ve personally interacted with,” he said. “Whether it’s somebody that I meet at a bar, if Josh and I are out or we’re talking to friends. I’m really excited to share our relationship with readers. But Josh, my partner, my parents, and my brother, four people who I’m closest to in the family, are fairly quiet. They don’t love attention and shy away from the limelight.”

A photo circulated of Kal at the Knicks/Pistons game in New York in March of 2018, which you can see here via Parade, is believed to be of Josh and Kal together; however, neither have ever confirmed if this is the case.

Josh is a NASCAR fan.

In his book, Josh reportedly recounted his first date with Josh, and be taken aback that he arrived to his apartment with an 18 pack of Coors Light and a plan to watch NASCAR.

“I thought, ‘This obviously is not going to work out,” Kal said. “I have one day off from The White House and this dude is unironically watching cars go around and make left turns?'” Kal then hilariously admitted that it had become a part of their routine. “Next thing you know, it’s been a couple months and we’re watching NASCAR every Sunday. I’m like, ‘What is happening?’ I wanted the reader to enjoy the love and the humor through all of those stories,” he explained.