Co-parenting is difficult, no matter the situation. In her new book, Mashonda Tifrere discusses finding a balanced, blended family with her ex Swizz Beatz and his wife, Alicia Keys. She talks to HL about what she needed to do to get to that point.
Mashonda Tifrere and Swizz Beatz‘s break-up was incredibly public in 2010, and put a strain on not only their relationship, but also on their son, Kaseem Dean Jr. When Mashonda noticed her son struggling, she went through a personal journey to work on herself, and then mend her relationship with Swizz and his wife, Alicia Keys, to ensure her son had the best support possible in all three of them. “You’ve gotta take the time off to heal. Be alone. I took a year off. I didn’t go out, I stopped talking to friends. I stopped talking to the media. I just started to work on Mashonda,” the singer revealed to HollywoodLife in an EXCLUSIVE interview while promoting her new book, Blend: The Secret To Co-Parenting & Creating A Balanced Family. “You really have to go super deep into yourself on a emotional, mental and spiritual level and dissect it all and put it back together. You have to go as deep as your childhood and heal that inner child so that you can then heal your adult. Once I started doing that work, everything became clearer.”
After healing herself following her divorce from Swizz in May 2010 and his engagement to Alicia Keys that same month, Mashonda took on her biggest challenge yet: Making peace with her ex’s new love. “You’ve got these people that you kind of don’t want to like, and they probably don’t want to like you either, but you have to because there’s a child involved. The child needs all of you. If you really love that child, you want to do what’s best. You want to make the energy around that child feel good, so you figure out a way to make it work,” Mashona said. “I didn’t want to raise a broken child. We did it for our children, we did it for our legacy, for our family.”
In her book, Mashonda gives advice on mending the open wounds that are created in family separation and divorce, and uses her own experience on how to create a co-parenting relationship that works. “The difference between co-parenting and a blended family, when you have child and you get divorced or separated or you break up, you still have to co-parent,” she explained. “Blending is adding a very thick layer of harmony, peace and love to that equation. You want to get to a place to where you can actually spend time with them, and give the child an opportunity to see unity amongst the people that he or she really loves, because they deserve that.” You can purchase Mashonda’s book, Blend: The Secret To Co-Parenting & Creating A Balanced Family, at all major book retailers.