Yes, Nick and Joe are still killing the music game, but let’s take it back to the true glory days for a sec. Without further ado, here is The Definitive Ranking Of Jonas Brothers Songs.
Obsessive Jonas Disorder is a serious disease that never really goes away, mostly because you keep stumbling upon lists like these. The upstate New York date on the Jonas Brothers Burnin’ Up Tour was pretty much my first real concert. Taylor Swift, who was dating Joe Jonas at the time, watched the show from the sound booth one row behind me. It was a special time and 12-year-old me was forever changed after that fateful day. Below, I’ve fondly ranked the JoBros’ best hits.
12. “First Time”
One of the last songs we got to hear from the trio before they split. It’s not terrible, it’s just kind of boring.
Most ridiculous lyric: “Let your heart control your mind/Make it feel like the first time.”
11. “Your Biggest Fan”
Remember the soundtrack to Jonas L.A., the JoBro’s Disney Channel show? Me neither. Also, Nick’s rap break is…rough. Bring back Big Rob, am I right? (More on that later.)
Most ridiculous lyric: “A star shines but your light is the brightest.”
10. “Play My Music”
The second best song on the Camp Rock soundtrack after “This Is Me,” obviously.
Most ridiculous lyric: “Hand clapping, hip shaking, heart breaking/There’s no faking.”
9. “That’s Just The Way We Roll”
One of the first songs that put the JoBros on the map, but I found it pretty annoying both then and now.
Most ridiculous lyric: “Let’s go dancing/Pop and lock/Battle dance against Hanson.”
8. “A Little Bit Longer”
The song we all hated to love. Nick’s famous in-concert speech about being diagnosed with diabetes felt like pandering even to 12-year-old me.
Most ridiculous lyric: “Got the news today/Doctors said I had to stay/A little bit longer and I’ll be fine.”
7. “Much Better”
Joe iconically shades his ex Taylor Swift in this song. Too bad the album has such a dumb name. I won’t even print it here.
Most ridiculous lyric: “Now I’m done with superstars/And all the tears on her guitar.”
6. “BB Good”
The opening jam on A Little Bit Longer, which is arguably their best album.
Most ridiculous lyric: “I don’t wanna hurt you/I wanna kiss you!”
5. “When You Look Me In The Eyes”
Nick at his most soulful.
Most ridiculous lyric: “When you look me in the eyes/I catch a glimpse of heaven/I find my paradise.”
The vintage-style video is adorable (as is Joe in suspenders); this is the one that made everyone swoon.
Most ridiculous lyric: “I think about your eyes all the time/You’re beautiful but you don’t even try.”
3. “Year 3000”
The video for this song played constantly on Disney Channel and is forever imprinted in my brain. So catchy and definitely some of the guys’ most fun lyrics.
Most ridiculous lyric: “I heard a funny noise/Went out to the backyard to find out/If it was one of those rowdy boys.”
Rihanna, sit down.
Most ridiculous lyric: “So this is how the story ends, a conversation on IM/Well, I’m done.”
1. “Burnin’ Up”
The easy favorite. A total jam that holds up over time. Also, the video is perfection: Nick stars as James Bond and impresses a girl (Selena Gomez), Joe wears a fake mustache, and Kevin is cast as a karate master. Most importantly, their bodyguard Big Rob has a rap feature.
Most ridiculous lyric: “I’m slipping into the lava/And I’m tryin’ to keep from goin under.”