From Kris Jenner to Mathew Knowles, Hollywood is FULL of stage parents. But while some think overbearing parenting ensures success, HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY talked to a doctor, learning kids of helicopter parents often ‘sabotage’ their own lives — yikes! Learn what NOT to do as a parent here.
While Kris Jenner, 61, certainly seems to get the job done when it comes to running the Kardashian/Jenner empire, her overbearing momager tactics apparently come at a steep price! Speaking with Carole Lieberman, M.D. and author of the soon-to-be-released book, LIONS and TIGERS and TERRORISTS, OH MY! How to Protect Your Child in a Time of Terror, HollywoodLife.com EXCLUSIVELY learned just how traumatic helicopter parenting can be for children as they get older. And seriously, what can happen is not pretty!
“An overbearing or ‘helicopter’ parent wants to control every aspect of their child’s life — from what they eat to what they wear to what they do when they grow up,” Dr. Lieberman told us. “Most helicopter parents haven’t achieved their own dreams, so they live vicariously through their child, pushing them to reach the dream that escaped their parent.” And the results can be serious, not to mention last a lifetime!
“[Helicopter parenting can] stunt a child’s psychological development. The child comes to believe that they can’t do anything on their own. They doubt their own abilities because the parent has made them totally dependent upon them,” Dr. Lieberman explained. “Ultimately, the child of a helicopter parent realizes that they are living the parent’s dream and not their own — and they rebel or sabotage themselves in order to punish their parent.”
In Kris’ case, she feels the need to control each of her kids’ lives in every way — from their businesses to their appearances, and even their love lives! “Kris Jenner has taught her daughters, the Kardashian girls, that fame and fortune is everything,” the author said. “Although she guided them to achieve this, their seemingly glamorous lives are very troubled, and yet they cannot break free of their mother’s control.” Sounds kind of like a nightmare, right? But Kris is far from the only overbearing parent in Hollywood!
Joe Jackson, Michael and Janet Jackson‘s dad, is a notorious example of being damaging to this kids because of how much he tried to control their lives! “Joe Jackson never reached the heights of musical stardom that he wanted for himself, so he lived vicariously through his son, and demanded that Michael fulfill his dreams,” the author continued. “Ultimately, Michael rebelled against his dad’s overbearing parenting and sabotaged himself by becoming addicted to drugs, so that he could no longer perform.”
But have no fear! Dr. Lieberman’s tips on how NOT to cross that fine line between overbearing and caring, are actually pretty genius. For starters, while the expert acknowledges that “parents need to be very involved in their child’s life — from checking homework every day to checking in with how their child is feeling,” they also need to be able to listen.
“You need to always be on the lookout for what their natural talents and interests are,” Dr. Lieberman advises. “It is important to provide your child with opportunities — such as after-school lessons and camp. But, let them choose the activities, such as music or tennis lessons or baseball or horseback riding camp.”
Overall, “There is a fine line between pushing your kids forward in a positive way and damaging them by pushing too hard,” Dr. Lieberman said. “It’s good to encourage your kids to explore a variety of opportunities, but superimposing your will over theirs — and telling them what they must do instead of allowing them to decide what they want, after sampling a lot of different options — is not good.” We could not agree more!
Tell us, HollywoodLifers — Do you think Kris’ parenting style has been harmful to her kids? Or do you think she’s an amazing mom?