Still haven’t gotten over Donald Trump and Marco Rubio’s tiff about the size of Donald’s…ahem…package? We haven’t either — and apparently we’re not alone! In fact, a doctor has perfected a solution for all men suffering from penis envy — we’re looking at YOU, Donald!
We couldn’t believe it when Donald Trump, 69, insinuated that he had a large member during the March 3 debate. Talk about uncalled for! But did Donald feel the need to aggressively defend his manhood due to a bad case of penis envy? You know what they say, whoever protests the most, usually has something to hide. If the big D truly DOES have an issue with his own little D, the presidential candidate is in luck! A California-based urologist has dedicated his life to assisting men who need an extra boot below the belt.
“It is a 270-degree tube made of very soft silicone, shaped like your penis from the base to the head,” Dr. James Elist said of his penis envy solution in a New York Post article. “It gets inserted into the member via a small incision in the groin and the girth immediately increases by about two inches. Same with the length.” Wow — that’s quite an improvement!
James explained that after his procedure, a man who is three inches flaccid and five inches erect, will become five inches when flaccid and six inches — on average — when erect. But that’s not even the best part, after two or three years, the weight from the implant will enlarge the penis even more, stretching it to an additional half-inch or so. Sounds like a miracle solution, right?
While at 13 thousand dollars, the permanent procedure is pricey, it only takes 45 minutes to an hour to complete, and according to James, many men think it is well worth the cost. After all, James created the device in the first place to help men feel more masculine as well as to help them satisfy their wives and girlfriends.
But since when did having a large package determine your level of manliness? Apparently in 1996, according to James’ website, when the Journal of Urology concluded that the average flaccid penile length was three and a half inches and the average erect length was five inches. And today, especially with modern science, men have become more concerned than EVER with comparing their penis sizes. Hence, penis envy and men occasionally trying to one-up each other — sometimes even on national television. So Donald, although you claim to have “no problem” in that area, it’s really nothing to be ashamed of if you do! James’ solution is a win-win for everybody!
What do you think of James’ solution to penis envy, HollywoodLifers?