In the May 4 episode of ‘Game Of Thrones’, Tommen is crowned King of Westeros, Daenerys crowns herself Queen of Slaver’s Bay, and Sansa is in as much trouble as she ever was.
In “The First of His Name,” the May 4 episode of Game Of Thrones, a couple of inevitable things happen: Tommen Baratheon (Dean Charles-Chapman) is crowned King of Westeros, we discover that Sansa has traded one prison for another, Daenerys is an HBIC, and the remaining Starks just generally continue to avoid any happiness or emotional reprieve of any kind. Full recap below!
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Tommen Baratheon Is Crowned; Cersei Admits Joffrey’s Shortcomings
“The First Of His Name” opens in King’s Landing, at Tommen Baratheon’s coronation. Long may he reign! Cersei (Lena Headey) approaches Margaery (Natalie Dormer) and asks her if she misses Joffrey. Margaery, not a fool, says, “He was my husband. My king.” Cersei’s not interested in a fairy tale conversation: “He would have been your nightmare.”
Cersei tells Margaery that Tommen, unlike Joffrey, is good, and kind, and that he will need a good queen to guide him; does Margaery, by chance, have any interest? Margaery, queen of my heart, tells an unconvinced Cersei that she hasn’t given it any thought at all, which is hilarious.
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Daenerys: ‘I Will Do What Queens Do — I Will Rule’
In Meereen, Daenerys (Emilia Clarke) learns of Joffrey’s death. She is told that she now has 8,000 Unsullied and 2,000 Second Sons (basically: the Navy) in her ranks. However, in more unpleasant news, the cities that Daenerys has left behind, supposedly free, are not so. In Yunkai, the men who were once free are now enslaved, and in Astapor, the counsel she had set in place to rule has been overthrown.
Daenerys is unwilling to sail for Westeros; she doesn’t see why the Westerosi people would follow her when she cannot even keep control of Slaver’s Bay. No, she will stay behind, and she will do what queens do — she will rule. This is interesting character development for Dany, who has been blinded up until now by her desire for revenge, by her desire to reclaim what’s rightfully hers.
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Lysa Arryn Is Still Insane; Petyr Is Still Creepy
Sansa (Sophie Turner) and Littlefinger (Aiden Gillen) have arrived at the Vale, but Sansa is hide her true identity. She is now Alayne, Petyr’s niece. That’s going to make his creepy feelings toward her a lot creepier.
Hey, remember Lysa Arryn (Kate Dickie)? She and her son, Robin (Lino Facioli), are as alarming as ever. When Petyr and Sansa enter the Eyrie, Robin — approximately 11 years old — is on Lysa’s lap.
We learn that Petry is Lysa’s intended, but he’s just not that into her. It’s clear that he’s playing her like a chess piece — pretty easily done, considering she’s bonkers. She reveals that Petyr’s the one who convinced her to poison her own husband, Jon Arryn. It was also his idea to have Lysa write the letter to Catelyn framing the Lannisters for the murder which would eventually set off the War of the Five Kings because of Joffrey’s false claim to the throne — which Jon Arryn had figured out. Phew. Petyr has been playing literally everyone from the very beginning!
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Lannisters Are Going To Have To Start Paying The Crown’s Debts
Cersei and her father, Tywin (Charles Dance), are discussing marriage like politics. Shortly after Margaery is to marry Tommen, Cersei is to marry Loras (Finn Jones); the Tyrells are the only family who match the Lannisters in terms of resources, and they need to keep the relationship strong.
Tywin reveals that the Crown is in enormous debt to the Iron Bank of Braavos — their last mine stopped producing three years ago. Yikes. Looks like the Lannisters are going to have to start paying not only their own debts, but the Crown’s, as well.
Cersei remains hellbent on crucifying Tyrion for Joffrey’s murder, and reminds Tywin that Tyrion has sullied the Lannister name — and protecting the Lannister name is something that Tywin has started wars over.
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Arya’s Death Prayer Is A Bit Ambitious With Only Needle As A Weapon
Over to Arya (Maisie Williams) and Sandor (Rory McCaan), where she is reciting her death prayer in earshot of her traveling companion. She can’t go to sleep until she recites the names of all the people she’s going to kill — including Sandor himself.
The next day, Arya is practicing her “water dancing” (read: sword fighting) and Sandor, predictably, makes fun of her for prancing around. He lets her have a go at him, for her dead friend Micah whom he killed, and Needle won’t even pierce his armor. He backhands her and, with Needle pointed at her throat, Sandor reminds her that Syrio Forel — her “water dancing” teacher — is dead, and, essentially, that her techniques are best learnt from people who are still alive, like the people on her list.
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Sansa Is More Cunning Than Anyone Gives Her Credit For
In the Eyrie, Lysa and Sansa are bonding over lemon cakes for approximately one minute before Lysa accuses Sansa of being pregnant by Petyr, of enticing him with her young pretty ways, just like her mother, Catelyn, did.
Sansa, crying, tells her aunt that Petyr doesn’t think anything of her, that he just thinks of her as a stupid girl with silly dreams. It’s an interesting moment — Sansa has been placed in some pretty perilous positions, and has been able to remain standing by convincing everyone around her that there’s nothing going on in her pretty head. Sansa’s not stupid — she knows that Petyr doesn’t really love Lysa, and that his intentions toward Sansa are not entirely innocent. But Sansa cries, plays the fool, and Lysa lets her go, hushing her.
Oh, and it’s Lysa’s design to have Sansa marry her demented cousin, Robin.
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Brienne And Pod Are In A Buddy Cop Movie
Nothing is better than the buddy cop comedy we’re getting between Brienne (Gwendoline Christie) and Pod (Daniel Portman), her squire bestowed upon him by Tyrion (Peter Dinklage). He can’t even ride a horse. It’s the most precious.
Later, he ruins their dinner because he was cooking an unskinned rabbit over a fire which, predictably, catches fire. Aw, poor Pod — he’s trying so hard. Brienne asks him if he’s ever done anything even remotely related to combat, and he admits that he killed one of the Kingsguard — Ser Mandon — because he tried to kill Tyrion. After that confession, Brienne, appraising, decides to let him help her take off her armor. Baby steps! These two are going to be fighting over the car’s radio station any moment now!
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Cersei: ‘Everywhere In The World, They Hurt Little Girls’
Back in King’s Landing, briefly, Cersei and Prince Oberyn (Pedro Pescal) go for a walk. She asks after the health and happiness of her daughter Myrcella, who is currently stationed in Dorne, and she says that she hopes Myrcella is happy. “You have my word. We don’t hurt little girls in Dorne,” Oberyn tells her. “Everywhere in the world, they hurt little girls,” Cersei replies.
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Bran Stark & Craster’s Keep
Up north, at Craster’s Keep, Bran (who is aging by approximately three years each episode) and the Reeds are still prisoner.
Jon Snow (Kit Harington) and the Night’s Watch are approaching Craster’s Keep, but Locke (Noah Taylor) has already cased the area, and has found Bran (Isaac Hempstead-Wright) — he tells Jon that there are wild hounds in the shack by the Craster’s, and that they’d best not approach. Sneaky.
Suddenly, Karl and his fellow Night’s Watch mutineers decide to terrorize the Reeds. Karl, of course, threatens Meera (Ellie Kendrick) with rape. Jojen interjects, says that if Karl lets Meera go, Jojen can help him. “How are you going to do that?” “I have The Sight. I can see things. Things that haven’t happened yet.” “That’s a fine thing. Have you seen what I’m going to do with your sister? Have you seen what they’re going to do with your sister?” Sigh.
Jojen, with immense satisfaction, tells him that he’s seen him die tonight — has watched his body burn. Just then, they hear the Night’s Watch descend.
Amidst the chaos, Locke sneaks into the shack, confirms Bran’s identity, and throws the young Stark over his shoulder. In the most interesting thing Bran has ever done, he skinchanges, taking over Hodor’s body. Bran-as-Hodor manages to get free from the chains, catches up with Locke, picks him up, and strangles him, gloriously.
‘Game Of Thrones’ Recap — Bran Stark & Jon Snow ALMOST Reunite
Just as Bran is about to call for Jon, Jojen advises against it — Jon would only take Bran back to Castle Black to protect him, and wouldn’t let him continue on his journey to find the three-eyed raven. If I’m honest, I’m not sure that would still rate on my own personal list of priorities when I’m a skinchanging superhero with the keys to Winterfell if only I could get enough of an army on my side. A warm bed and a steady food supply, please!
Jon, meanwhile, stabs his sword right through Karl’s neck and through his mouth. It’s a pretty heroically violent moment for Jon, whose scenes mostly involve moping, handsomely. I couldn’t be more glad to see Karl meet a bloody end.
Jon invites Craster’s daughter wives back to Castle Black, and they’re like, thanks, but no thanks — Craster raped and beat us, and then the Crows raped and beat us — burn the place down, and then get lost forever. And so “The First Of His Name” ends with Craster’s keep in a fiery blaze.
What did you think of “The First Of His Name,” HollywoodLifers? Are you enjoying Dany’s character development? Is there anything more enjoyable than the scenes between Margaery and Cersei, and between Brienne and Pod? Vote above and comment (WITHOUT SPOILERS) below!
— Amanda Michelle Steiner
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