Kody and his four wives’ big plan to have a polygamist marriage-affirming commitment ceremony backfires when he blows up at his bored 17 kids! Kind of ironic!
Hey, Sister Wives‘ Kody Brown, isn’t the idea of a commitment ceremony supposed to be to affirm the strength and love of your family — not to freak out on your poor kids!?
‘Sister Wives’ Recap: Kody Brown Threatens To Kick His Kids Out Of The Family
It’s inevitable that Kody’s plan to have a commitment ceremony with his four wives — Meri, Janelle, Christine, and Robyn — will backfire, when what’s supposed to be a spiritual statement turns into a bash for 200 people with custom-made designer gowns for the wives, a family mission statement, and lights strung across the street.
[hl_ndn videoid=”23894870″ videotitle=”Sister Wives Fight Over House Size” ]
[hl_ndn videoid=”25512461″ videotitle=”‘Sister Wives’ Graduation Meltdown” ]
As the day of the ceremony approaches, zero is going right. And really, Kody should have expected this when he and his wives decided that each woman would design her very own party dress and have a recent design school grad, Sam, create them.None of the wives, of course, are designers, and yet they push on , creating dresses, each one more unflattering than the other.
Kody is wisely struck speechless by Christine’s voluminous, yellow, black and pink princess dress, which even she admits is awful. Not that her next attempt is any better — her gown makes her look like an orange Pope. Meanwhile, it’s 36 hours before the party and teary “designer,” Sam, finally gives up on Meri’s “edgy” dress made from undrapeable fake leather that looks like the backseat of a car.
Then there’s the family “mission statement,” meticulously crafted by the Browns for months, with their intense-looking “family” therapist, Nancy Hunterton. How do these people even afford a family therapist, along with their four McMansions, and new commitment suits for all the boys?
‘Sister Wives’ Recap: Brown Family Commitment Ceremony Goes Awry
Then Robyn throws a fit when Kody doesn’t want to order all 17 kids to sign the mission statement. “If they don’t, they can move out,” she threatens.
Kody’s wisely resistant to the forced signing because he worries about the public perception of polygamist cults like Warren Jeffs‘, which forced teen girls into polygamist marriages. But Robyn’s hardcore stance clearly influences him when the family attempts a disastrous commitment ceremony rehearsal and the Brown brood of 17 is so bored that they can’t even stand still.
“If any of you misbehaves during our commitment ceremony, I’ll kick you out of the family,” Kody rants. Nice touch, Kody.
Isn’t a commitment ceremony about bringing your family together, not blowing it apart? The kids, to their credit, couldn’t care less about their parents’ latest time-consuming obsession.
Next Up On ‘Sister Wives’: The Big Ceremony
I can hardly wait ’til next week when they’ll all gather ’round to watch their five parents each pour different-colored sands together to symbolize the blending of their 4-wife, 1-husband family. Then, there’ll be the planting of the symbolic Tree of Life in one of the family’s four yards, the obligatory signing of that family mission statement, and the donning of symbolic cuffs by all, emblazoned with a Tree of Life, designed by Robyn.
Handcuffs? Seems a little too literal a symbol. But then maybe the kids do need cuffs to keep them from running away screaming when they see their mothers’ commitment outfits! There’s nothing worse for a child than a parent who’s trying to be edgy.
It’s even worse than having to explain at school that your family’s polygamists!
So, HollywoodLifers, was it okay or awful for Kody to threaten to throw kids out of the family? Let me know. [hl_twitter_followme username=”BonnieFuller” template=”bonnie-fuller” text=”Follow Bonnie!”] — Bonnie Fuller