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Should You Ever Chase A Guy The Way Jennifer Love Hewitt Has Gone After Ben Flajnik?

Wed, August 10, 2011 12:11pm EDT by 2 Comments

Is it OK to pursue a man, or should you let him come to you?

Jennifer Love Hewitt, like her middle name implies, is a little aggressive when it comes to finding love. Let’s not forget, this is a girl who once had picked out three engagement rings when involved former boyfriend Alex Beh...whom she had only been been dating for seven months…whom hadn’t brought up marriage at all. So when the actress set her sites on The Bachelorette runner-up Ben Flajnik, she decided to ruthlessly pursue him. But does it ever really work when the girl acts as an aggressor?

When Ashley Hebert chose JP Rosenbaum, the 32-year-old former Ghost Whisperer star decided she had nothing to lose by reaching out to her fantasy man. Life & Style reports that she actually took an hour flight from LA to San Francisco for a date.

This is how it went down.

“Omg! Ben f except my final rose !!!,” Jennifer tweeted Aug. 2. “Gotta book a flight to Sonoma !!!:):)”

The 28-year-old winemaker quickly returned her interest.  “Aaaaaaahhhhhhh Ben f is following me!!!!!,” she wrote later on that same day. “You lovelys are the best!!!!:):) sending a million roses to u guys too”

Four days later, the two had a date. On Aug. 6, people spotted Jen and Ben at the Lion’s Pub in San Francisco.

“Ben from The Bachelorette is making out with Jennifer Love Hewitt,” one eyewitness tweeted.

“Ben and Jennifer Love Hewitt appeared to be dating,” another onlooker noted. “All in all, Ben seemed to be perfectly content as the second-place loser on The Bachelorette.”

Jennifer, who’s usually quite vocal on Twitter only tweeted twice on Aug. 6 saying hi to her fans. But on Aug. 7, she  coudln’t resist gushing, “Morning lovelys! I got lost in the most amazing sat! Just when you think u can’t be surprised…. You are and it’s awesome!”

I’m all for Jen being happy, but there are a lot of problems here. One, men may claim that they dislike being the aggressor, but if they don’t have to work for something, it becomes worthless to them. Meaning: if they have to work to get you, they’ll value you more.

Two: Ben feels emasculated right now. Ashley may have slept with him and then definitely ditched him in front of a nationwide TV audience. If a celebrity is going after him, why would he turn that down? It’s going to make him feel powerful and in charge again. But will it be love? Will Jennifer get what she want? I’m not sure, given that Ben seems like a decent guy, but my guess would be no.

That said, nothing good is going to come of you chasing after a guy. Let him come to you. If he doesn’t, then he wasn’t the right guy for you in the first place.


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