'Real Housewives Of New York' Recap — I Want To Speed Date With Sonja Morgan!

Can we just kick everyone off and have Sonja, Kelly, Cindy and LuAnn be on every episode? Thanks!

Ramona Singer modeled (watch your back Karlie Kloss!), Alex McCord celebrated turning 4? and Kelly Bensimon once again proved she may be the wisest soul of the bunch.

First things first, as crazy as everyone yearns to portray her, Kelly is without doubt the voice of reason for this glorious season of Real Housewives. That out of the way, how can I go speed dating with Kelly, Cindy Barshop, LuAnn de Lesseps and the ever entertaining, and truly glorious, Sonja Morgan? Anyone?

Where to begin with the remarkable debacles of this new episode. I can say I am truly thankful for the fact that I will never regret a birthday party in my life after seeing the wind blown Antarctic disaster that was burgeoning supermodel Alex’s sweet forty-somethingish. When the high point of an afternoon is a child being showered in spilled alcohol, everyone loses. Well, everyone but the television viewer.

Ramona modeled again. So that happened.

Also modeling, Alex. She is very, very gorgeous and genetically blessed. Just ask her. Actually don’t. She needs to bottle up that noise. Permanently. It was however great to see a woman finally trying to make Winona Ryder‘s Beetlejuice ‘do work. And in public at that! Go you Alex!

Back to people we like. Cindy is pretty amazing. More so than any other housewife, save perhaps Bethenny Frankel, Cindy seems to actually have a life beyond creating premeditated problems. How novel! This however seems to relegate her to a somewhat minor role, but it was worth it to see her general annoyance with a pompous youngster who was eager to be filmed for a reality show and mock her age at speed dating.

It was business as usual beyond that with Jill down under and no real drama. How did you feel about the new episode HollywoodLifers?

-Chris Spargo