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'Bridalplasty' Recap — Cheyenne Gets A New Nose, Jessica Gets Sent Home & We All Die A Little Inside!

Sun, December 5, 2010 10:28pm EDT by 2 Comments

The shallow theatrics continue on America’s favorite new reality show with the ‘brides’ getting a chance to practice their vows this week!

At a time when the union of marriage is such a highly discussed and debated topic in this country, it is wonderful to have the women of Bridalplasty to let us know what that union really is all about — showing off your new nose and breast augmentation! Oh, and also vowing to your husband that you will burp less, rub their feet and have sex at least six days a week.

This week got started off with mean girl Jenessa talking about how she was going to start an alliance and get all the girls to follow her so she could win the whole shebang. Given that Jenessa might just be one of the most annoying women ever to be spotted on a reality program and seems to have the intelligence of a high performing grade school student at best it will be fun to see how this plays out.

Then the girls got a chance to pick out wedding bands that could be theirs if they survive the next eleven episodes of painfully innocuous challenges. None chose for style or fit from what I could see but rather just amount of diamonds on band.

The challenge, for which the winner received a new nose (now there’s something I never thought I’d write), was to correctly predict the five vows your fiance would want you say to them at the altar. The ladies almost uniform inability to get any of these right combined with their possible new faces and/or bodies makes me apprehensive for how long these couples are going to make it.

Cheyenne won in the end by guessing four of her man’s five vows and was quickly carted off to get that new nose. She’s gonna love it the doctor says though he failed to mention any sort of return policy.

Sweet little Jessica ended up in the bottom three at the end and managed to score just one vote to stay in the “mansion” despite everyone explaining she was their favorite housemate. So away the poor little girl went though I feel it may be for the better as I was beginning to worry some of the larger contestants might in fact try to eat her at some point.

What did you think about the latest episode?

-Chris Spargo