I don’t want to say nothing happened on the June 24 episode of True Blood, but I will say it was a relatively calm week in Bon Temps. The night did, however, set the stage for some pretty epic story lines to come, including the return of the fairies. (Yep, they’re back.)

Hurricane Tara (Rutina Wesley) continued her rampage through town, but totally choked when faced with her first potential victim — and yes, for all you 90210 fans, that was totally cousin Emily (Abbie Cobb) who almost became Tara’s dinner. The baby vamp eventually took shelter at Merlotte’s, but when life among the undead became too much for her to handle, she hightailed it to the nearest tanning salon, where we left her attempting suicide in a tanning bed. (That final scene brought back unsettling memories of THIS SCENE from Final Destination 3.)

As always, Pam (Kristin Bauer Van Straten) remained indifferent towards her brain-damaged baby. Not even a fairy jolt from Sookie (Anna Paquin) could take her mind off her own maker, whom she spent most of the episode remembering in flashbacks. She also showed off her incredible texting abilities — a vampire’s greatest skill, I think.

Meanwhile, Bill (Stephen Moyer) and Eric’s (Alexander Skarsgard) little Authority Party took a sexy turn when Salome — not to be confused with salami, which is a delicious deli meat — had her ancient way with both captive vampires. As Rosalyn (Carolyn Hennesy) put it oh-so well, “That’s a sandwich I’d take a bite out of anytime.” Then, just to prove she’s a super slut, Salome (Valentina Cervi) also took Roman (Chris Meloni) to bed. Triple-meat sandwich!

We also got our first look at the faeries of season five when Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) encountered Claude (Giles Matthey) and tracked his scent — which she described as cotton candy, fresh-baked bread and f***ing sex — to an empty field. (For a sneak peek at what’s to come with the fairies this season, check out my interview with Camilla Ludington, who plays Claude’s other sister Claudette.)

Meanwhile, Jessica’s “f**k buddy” Jason (Ryan Kwanten) reunited with his own Mrs. Robinson, the former teacher who literally taught him to be the sexpert he is today. But instead of enjoying himself, Jason realized that a life of sex has been a huge mistake. Maybe our little boy really is growing up!

Other plot points worth discussing, but not at great length:
*** Sookie, once again reminding us all how dumb she is, told Acide (Joe Manganiello) that she killed Debbie after her parents came looking for their daughter.
*** Terry (Todd Lowe) skipped town, but couldn’t tell Arlene (Carrie Preston) where he was going, why he was leaving, or how long he’d be gone. Sketchy?
*** Steve Newlin (Michael McMillian) is the new Nan Flanagan, which I fully support. Especially if he keeps making amazing faces like this one!
*** And lastly, it looks like Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) still has Jesus’ family demon inside of him. Before seeing the demon’s face in the mirror, he almost poisoned an entire batch of gumbo at Merlotte’s.

What’s your take on this week’s snoozer? Was Sookie an idiot for telling Alcide about Debbie? Do you think Pam will come to Tara’s rescue? And can we all agree that Russell Edgington needs to recover, like, yesterday? Drop a comment with your thoughts and theories.

— Andy Swift

Follow @AndySwift

Sookie (Anna Paquin) and Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) thought they made the right decision by asking Pam (Kristin Bauer Van Straten) to turn Tara (Rutina Wesley) into a vampire, but on the June 17 episode of True Blood, they’ll begin to question that decision — especially when Tara attacks them, fangs out!

Meanwhile, Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) and Bill (Stephen Moyer) are mercilessly tortured at the hand of Authority leader Roman (Chris Meloni); Alcide continues dealing with the fallout of killing Marcus; and Jason (Ryan Kwanten) discovers a few more tricks up Steve Newlin’s sleeve.

Watch a video from tonight’s episode below, then drop a comment with your thoughts and theories: Do you think Tara will eventually become good, or will her out-of-control behavior earn her the true death? 

Click here to view the embedded video.

— Andy Swift

Follow @AndySwift

More True Blood News:

1. ‘True Blood’ Season 5 Trailer: Russell Returns
2. Sookie Hooks Up With Alcide In New ‘True Blood’ Season 5 Trailer
3. ‘True Blood’ Season 5 Clip: Eric & Pam Fight Over Russell Edgington

I’d like to preface this rant by clarifying that I think Rutina Wesley is a fantastic actress. And she’s very pretty. That said, I’m kind of disappointed that Tara managed to survive her should-have-been-fatal gunshot wound on the June 10 season premiere of True Blood. As much as I worship the writers — without them, we’d have no show to enjoy — I feel like they’ve never really known what to do with Tara, and I’m not sure her new life as a vampire will solve that problem.

From the moment she was introduced, Tara has been — for lack of a better term — the show’s most heavily dumped-upon character.

> Season 1: When we first met Tara, she was living with her bats**t crazy mother, who we later learned was possessed by a demon.
> Season 2: She took refuge with with Maryann (a maenad), then fell in love with Eggs, who ended up getting shot and killed.
> Season 3: She found herself in a horrifically abusive relationship with vampire Franklin, who was eventually killed in front of her.
> Season 4: After six months away from Bon Temps, she reinvented herself as a cage-fighting lesbian — then returned to town and became a Wiccan.

And now that she’s been turned into a vampire — the one creature she despises more than anything else — her problems are only going to get worse. So my question for you, fellow Truebies, is this: Will Tara’s new journey make up for her uneven/confusing past, or is this another misguided attempt at giving her character some relevance?

(Real talk: While a good chunk of my disdain for Tara stems from her generally being annoying, I also pity her. The girl deserves some peace, and I doubt she’ll find it with a pair of fangs.)

— Andy Swift

Follow @AndySwift

We all know the fifth season of True Blood will feature the return of fan-favorite villain Russell Edgington (Denis O’Hare), but there’s one return fans are still in the dark about — until now! Creator Alan Ball confirms that gunshot-victim Tara (Rutina Wesley) is “still a part of the show,” but it’s still anyone’s guess as to how she’ll continue existing in Bon Temps.

“I’m sure fans have a lot of different ideas of how that could be possible,” Alant told TVGuide.com at the fifth season premiere party March 30. “One of those ideas is correct.”

Rutina, herself, also spilled some details about Tara’s return.

“Bill and Eric can’t come running to the rescue,” she confessed, adding that Bill (Stephen Moyer) and Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) are too busy following their own tag-team murder of Nan. She also said the real interesting part to watch will be “Tara’s reaction to Sookie and Sookie’s reaction to Tara. … All I can say is it’s charged.”

So how do you think Tara will continue on in Bon Temps? As a ghost? A vampire? A zombie? Drop a comment with your best theory!

— Andy Swift

Follow @AndySwift

More True Blood News:

1. ‘True Blood’ Season 5 Trailer: Russell Returns
2. Sookie Hooks Up With Alcide In New ‘True Blood’ Season 5 Trailer
3. ‘True Blood’ Season 5 Clip: Eric & Pam Fight Over Russell Edgington

True Blood‘s fifth season premieres June 10 on HBO, which means we’re just 12 days away from finding out whether or not Tara (Rutina Wesley) survived that seemingly fatal gunshot to her head. We can only speculate until then, but this brand-new trailer gives us our biggest clue yet: A teary Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) tells Sookie (Anna Paquin), “You survived, you always do,” seeming to imply that someone else did not fare so well.

But when Sookie’s not mourning the loss of her best friend, she’s cowering in fear over the return of Russell Edgington (Denis O’Hare) — and by “cowering in fear,” I mean brushing it off with sassy one-liners.

Watch the new trailer below, then vote: Do YOU think Tara is alive?

Click here to view the embedded video.

— Andy Swift

Follow @AndySwift

True Blood has always been great at two things: incorporating puns into its advertising — the new tagline for season five is “everything is at stake” — and keeping viewers guessing about what’s next. Fans have been dying to know whether or not Tara (Rutina Wesley) survived her seemingly fatal gunshot wound since last season’s finale, and her inclusion in the show’s new collection of character posters is only making us all more curious!

All the usual suspects are there — Sookie (Anna Paquin), Eric (Alexander Skarsgard), Bill (Stephen Moyer), etc. — along with newcomer Roman (Chris Meloni) and returning favorite Russell (Denis O’hare).

So why would Tara get her own poster if she wasn’t going to survive, or at least be seen in the fifth season?

What do YOU think? Is Tara really alive? And which new (or returning) character are you most excited to see in season five? Let’s talk it out in the comments section.

— Andy Swift

Follow @AndySwift

Five deaths, two disappointed vampires and one unsettling return added up to a seriously mind-blowing True Blood season finale. And while I predict a lot of fans have a bad taste in their mouth after the Sept. 11 episode, I loved every minute — and more importantly — every twist.

Let’s start with death number one: Jesus (Kevin Alejandro!) Still possessed by Marnie (Fiona Shaw), Lafayette (Nelsan Ellis) knifed his brujo lover in order to absorb his freaky demonic powers. He then silver-chained Bill (Stephen Moyer) and Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) to a pyre, and while I won’t poo-poo the gratuitously shirtless eye candy, I’d rather our vamps not be on the brink of death for once.

Fortunately Sookie (Anna Paquin), Tara (Rutina Wesley) and Holly (Lauren Bowles) arrived to save the day! Taking advantage of Halloween’s natural magic, the trio busted out a spell to use their dead ancestors against Marnie. I never thought I’d see Sookie’s little Gran physically pull a human out of another human, but hey, anything goes on True Blood.

Once the madness died down — pun intended — it was time for Sookie to deal with what really matters in life: choosing between Bill and Eric! Using her head, for once, Sookie confessed that even though she loved both vampires, her best option was to let them both go and see what a single life has to offer her. (Personally, I think her best option would have been another threesome, but hey, I just want her to be happy.)

Meanwhile, far away from the chaos, Jason (Ryan Kwanten) and Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) had themselves a hot little Halloween. After coming clean to Hoyt (Jim Parrack), Jason was free to ravage Little Red Riding Hood to his heart’s content. After she left, Jason was visited by another familiar face — Steve Newlin! He’s back, and he’s a freakin’ vampire! (Sorry, did I say Jason was “far away from the chaos?” I guess I spoke too soon.)

Arlene (Carrie Preston) finally got her long-awaited visit from René this week, but it didn’t go quite as she expected. Instead of attacking her, or even mentioning one word about the baby they share together, he came to deliver a warning — about Terry (Todd Lowe)! He said he’s seen the ghosts of Terry’s past, and that she should run while she can. Hmm… Could this have anything to do with his old war buddy (Scott Foley) showing up in Bon Temps?

Nan Flanagan (Jessica Tuck) also met her untimely demise this week, surprisingly, at the hands of King Bill. She informed Bill and Eric that she quit her job and was planning to rebel against the Authority, joined by a faction of vampires who have been plotting a move for quite some time. But it was her calling them both “puppy dogs” for Sookie that drove them both over the edge. And as much as I loved Nan, I think Eric said it best while standing over her lifeless puddle. “What a bitch.”

Methinks we got a taste of what’s in store for season five — and I’m kind of terrified. Alcide (Joe Manganiello) was called to a parking garage, where he discovered someone had dug a huge hole in the ground. Why, you ask? Judging by the broken silver chain Alcide picked up, I’m going to go ahead and assume our buddy Russell Edgington (Denis O’Hare) is back. And he’s pissed. So hide your humans and hide your fairies! We’re all in for a whole lot of pain.

And then there was that last scene — the one every True Blood fan will be talking about until season five premieres next summer. Sookie came home to find a shotgun-wielding Debbie (Brit Morgan), who ended up blowing a hole in Tara’s head when she knocked Sookie out of the way. And despite the she-wolf’s plea for Sookie to spare her life, our little fairy grabbed that shotgun and finally blasted her in the face — another moment fans of the book have been patiently waiting for.

Now tell me what YOU thought of the big finale: Did Sookie make the right choice? Will Russell be back in full swing next season? And which death shocked you the most? We’re in for a long wait until next season, so let’s start talking!

— Andy Swift

Follow Andy on Twitter for more True Blood

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Ding-dong, the witch is dead! Well, sort of. On the Sept. 4 episode of True Blood, Jesus (Kevin Alejandro) used his insane brujo powers — see the terrifying image above — to separate Marnie (Fiona Shaw) from Antonia and lower the forcefield around the Moon Goddess Emporium, allowing Bill (Stephen Moyer) and Eric (Alexander Skarsgard) to bust in and finish her off.

But before Bill got to put a barrage of bullets into Marnie — which he did, and it was awesome — old Eric reared his ugly head, as he ripped out her most loyal follower’s heart and literally drank it like a juice box. Sure the glamorous viking exchanged a few loving looks with Sookie (Anna Paquin), but I can’t help but wonder how they’re going to make their relationship work now that he’s back to his old Viking ways.

Meanwhile, despite kicking his nasty little drug habit, Andy’s (Chris Bauer) life just keeps getting weirder. While enjoying an evening stroll through the woods, he came across a lovely fairy named Morella who proceeded to make sweet nasty love to him and — I think — gave him some of her magical glowing fairy powers. Seriously, though, did you ever expect to see Andy have a sex scene on this show? Some things just can’t be unseen.

Jason (Ryan Kwanten) and Jessica (Deborah Ann Woll) also had another cute little moment this week. After Pam (Kristin Bauer Van Straten) attempted to blow up the witches’ headquarters herself, the explosion left Jason in serious need of blood. Jessica was, of course, more than happy to quench his thirst.

Slightly less adorable was the drama that went down at Alcide’s (Joe Manganiello) house. Marcus kidnapped Luna’s (Janina Gavankar) daughter and went to pick up Debbie (Brit Morgan), but got a little visit from Alcide and Sam (Trammell) who was, unsurprisingly, still pissed that Marcus killed Tommy (Marshall Allman.) Sam was nice enough to let Marcus live, but when he got back up grabbed a gun, Alcide went bananas and killed him. (Who’s the packmaster now, bitch?)

Alcide also finally “abjured” Debbie, which is basically the werewolf version of “pack up your sh*t and get out!” If only Sookie had been there. Perhaps with a shotgun.

And just when you thought next week’s season finale was going to be a bust — seriously, what could happen now that Marnie is dead? — the dearly departed psycho appeared in Lafayette’s bedroom and possessed him!

Now let’s talk about the episode: Do you miss brain-less, gentle Eric? Do you think Alcide will go after Sookie now that he’s single? And which Bon Temps resident won’t live to see season five? Drop a comment with your theories!

— Andy Swift

Follow Andy on Twitter for more True Blood