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Posted Mon, May 16, 2011 12:02pm EDT

Bonnie Says: 'Sister Wives' Kody Brown Breaks Down In Tears After He Fears His Family Will Be Torn Apart — But It's HIS Fault!

Kody Brown, you’re the one who chose TV fame knowing that it could put your polygamist family at risk, so why are you crying now?

Sister Wives Kody Brown wanted to have it all — his four wives, 16 children, fame and fortune, AND the chance to promote polygamy as an acceptable lifestyle.

But now fame has bitten him in the backside with the state of Utah investigating his family and now he as the “leader” has decided that all the Browns must flee to Las Vegas, to live in polygamist peace.

The only problem is that Kody decided the family had only eight days to find new homes, FOUR new homes to be exact, and he’s in a full-on polygamist panic.

He’s upset that there are — surprise! — no fifteen bedroom homes in Las Vegas. “Our realtor Mona tells us there are no BIG family homes here, like in Utah,” Kody laments. Hmm! I wonder why.

He says he needs to say good night to all four of his wives before bed each night so proximity of their living spaces is very important. Yea, I’d say so. At least polygamy  must keep you in shape Kody- all that running from house to house and bedroom to bedroom.

That’s why when he and his four wives find out there are no huge homes in Las Vegas, they decide to look for FOUR homes on the same street if possible.

FOUR homes — How do the Browns afford this? It’s the biggest mystery of Sister Wives, especially since all four homes they find are a nice size and in the same subdivision. But there’s no real discussion of how Janelle and Christina will squeeze in with six kids each, while Meri has just one.

Nonetheless Kody is still freaked. “I don’t want my kids to grow up like cousins instead of siblings, the proximity of the homes is the key to keeping the family together,” he moans to Mona Rieki, who has to be the world’s most understanding and sympathetic real estate agent.

He also manages to drop the news that the houses will accommodate “more children!” Yikes, Kody isn’t done reproducing! He wants MORE than his flock of sixteen kids!

Meanwhile, his five oldest teen children struggle with leaving their friends and schools — a move necessitated by their dad going public with their TV show and setting off the investigation.

Brave oldest son Logan, 15, defends his parents’ polygamist living arrangement: “It’s not a crime, it’s a lifestyle choice,” and tells his teen sibs that they have to give out a “positive vibe” to their younger sisters and brothers to help them through the move.

It’s heartbreaking to see these kids maturely trying to keep their spirits up while their parents, who chose fame, turn their children’s lives upside down.

Kody breaks down in tears when his offer on the four houses falls through and he faces the reality that the family will move in seven days with no place to go. He’s a way bigger baby than his oldest son, who never asked to be exposed as a “polyg kid” on national TV.

Sorry Kody — You wanted the truth out, now you have to accept the consequences that for many good reasons, polygamy IS against the the law!

–Bonnie Fuller