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Posted Thu, January 6, 2011 9:20pm EDT

Robert Pattinson Drops His Pants & Cheats On His Wife & Speeds Around In A Limo In New Movie! Exclusive! has your FIRST look at the ‘Cosmopolis’ script — and it’s juicy! Tell us who YOU think should play his wife & mistress.

We know some of you have read the book, but we’ve  just got done reading the SCRIPT for Robert Pattinson‘s reported new movie Cosmopolis — and it’s a doozy! The script is full of sex, suspense and financial turmoil for Rob’s character, Eric Packer. And get this: It all centers around Eric’s desire for a haircut! Yup, Rob’s hair is one of the main characters in his new flick.


R-Patz plays a 28-year-old multi-billionaire finance guru who drives around Manhattan in a high-tech, pimped-out limo in order to get a haircut, with many interruptions along the way. The entire movie is set within a 24 hour period and most of it takes place in his limosine. Eric Packer loses a lot of money for his clients by telling them to bet against the yen, and he is then stalked by two men who are out to get him. Eric curses, cheats on his wife, and seems to have an obsesssion with sex.


  1. Eric has a strained relationship with his wife, 22-year-old Elise Shifrin. He doesn’t seem to know her very well, and often asks her, “When are we going to have sex again?”
  2. Elise didn’t realize Eric’s eyes were blue until after they’d been married for 22 days. (Apparently he likes to keep his sunglasses on.)
  3. He cheats on his wife with Didi Fancher,  a 40-year-old “scorched blonde.”
  4. He GETS SHIRTLESS!!! (Yay!) And then he drops his pants and does the spread eagle during a doctor’s exam while speaking to his female co-worker… who is also in the room.
  5. Eric drinks brandy, drops the F-bomb multiple times and gets into fist fights!
  6. He shoots someone while driving around in his limo!
  7. Eric demands he get tasered, but instead drops vodka on his… er… nether regions.


(Eric) “I like your mother. You have your mother’s breasts.” (Elise) “Her Breasts?” (Eric) “Great stand-up t*ts.”


Who do you all want to see star alongside R-Patz in Cosmopolis? We’ve got two roles to fill here, people: Eric’s young devoted wife, and Eric’s older, “scorched blonde” mistress.” Personally, we’d love to see Kristen Stewart stick with R-Patz on the big screen… but we’d settle for another gorgeous young starlet, like Nina Dobrev, Mila Kunis, Emma Watson or Carrie Mulligan. As for the beautiful blonde, we’re thinking someone like Charlize Theron, Jennifer Aniston, Cameron Diaz, Nicole Kidman… or hey, why not Camille Grammer?

— Lorena O’Neil, reporting by Russ Weakland