She’s not married, but Amy Schumer still wants to be on ‘The Real Housewives’– and judging by her audition, we think she’s got what it takes!
It’s not like being an actual housewife is required to be on Real Housewives these days (just ask Bethenny Frankel!), and Amy Schumer wants in. Amy’s aim is to get cast on a new sector of the franchise focusing on a suburb of New Jersey, Real Housewives of Secaucus. To make the cut, she pitches why she’d be good on the show and, oh yes, she gives us a few potential taglines (no, she doesn’t say “holla” but they’re still amazing).
“I am all of those things,” Amy says as to why she deserves the title of real housewife. “I’m real, I’m in the house a lot, I am not a wife, but I have had sex with a lot of married people,” she explains.
Fair enough! And Amy assures the producer that, though she has no hubby, she will still bring the drama. “One of [my exes] was on a team,” she says. “I don’t want to mention what team because it’s not a professional one, but…” Well, talk about a selling point.
Finally, we get to the taglines, which everyone knows is basically the most essential part of being on Housewives. After all, “Get the Pinot ready, because it’s Turtle Time,” is what brought Ramona Singer into legendary status. Judging by Amy’s examples, she knows the stakes are high.
“I’m Amy, and I may look like a whore, but I am,” she says as her first attempt. Solid, but she can do better. “I don’t need a man, but I want one– any one,” she attempts again. There it is. Somebody get this girl a wineglass and a feud to get involved with!
First The Bachelorette, now Real Housewives— Amy wants to foray into reality TV, and we are ready for it! Would you want to watch Amy on Housewives?
— Casey Mink