Yahoo!’s new female CEO Marissa Mayer spoke out for the first time about juggling the demands of tending to Yahoo! and a baby. But she made it all sound easy — should she have?
Appearing To Be Super Woman
At 37, you are an inspiring role model for all young and not-so-young, working women.
But when you gave your first interview since giving birth to your first child, son Macallister Bogue, on Sept. 30, you spoke out in a way that may have made made the hearts of many working moms drop.
It certainly wasn’t intentional, but I think Marissa, in trying to be totally positive about your job, company and motherhood in general, you minimized the parenting demands you’re under.
“I knew that the job would be hard, and I know that the baby would be fun,” you told an audience at FORTUNE magazine’s Most Powerful Women dinner in Palo Alto, California on Nov. 27.
“And the thing that surprised me, and really puzzlingly so, is that the job is really fun! Yahoo! is a really fun place to work,” you explained.
But then you said — and this is the kicker:
“The baby’s been way easier than everyone made it out to be. I think I’ve been really lucky that way but I had a very easy, healthy pregnancy, he’s been easy. So those have been the two really terrific surprises — the kid has been easier and the job has been fun!”
Is It Really That Easy?
Marissa — I think you’re an amazing trooper, but I’m sorry, I don’t believe you for one second when you say that “the baby’s been way easier than everyone made it out to be.”
It’s just that first-time motherhood for any woman is never “easy,” no matter how much help you have. Babies are demanding. They need to be fed, often so many times a day that you barely finish one feeding when they’re ready for another. Then there’s the sleeping issue at night. And even if you have a night nurse who cares for the baby all night, if you’re breastfeeding you still need to get up to feed. Sometimes babies are fussy and cry a lot. Sometimes they have colic. And no mom can help herself from wanting to comfort their baby.
Then there’s your body changes. It’s uncomfortable to even sit down for a while after giving birth; your milk comes in; your emotions go on a rollar coaster as your hormones change.
All of this is manageable — but it’s not “easy,” and especially when you’re also responsible for running a $20 billion business. Plus, it’s one that you only took over a few months ago.
You, yourself decided to only take two weeks of maternity leave after you gave birth because you clearly felt the weight of your responsibilities sitting on your shoulders.
That in itself must have been a tough decision. I’m a mom of four, who also returned to work quickly after giving birth to each of my babies, but physically, it’s a tough gig and emotionally, it’s just as hard I completely sympathize.
Nevertheless with 12,000 employees at Yahoo! and a board of directors looking for you to lead, plus your own enthusiasm to get in and get the job done, you felt it was important to make the sacrifice of returning to work quickly.
All of this is understandable and hugely commendable, but I think it’s ok to let a little of your super woman image slip. Working women, and working moms especially, would appreciate you letting us know that you are “just like us,” too.
The Reality Of Being A Working Mom
When you just say that it’s been easier than you expected, most working moms simply respond “of course it is for her — she’s worth a fortune, she can afford 24 hours, 7 days a week babysitters, a cook, a housekeeper, a chauffeur, personal shoppers, assistants at the office, etc. etc.” — you get my drift.
That’s what most women are immediately thinking because they’ve been there, up with a sick, crying baby in the middle of the night, with bosses needing reports done, and trying to figure out who’s going to care for their little one the next day, because they can’t take them to daycare.
Most working moms may love their careers and babies but mostly they just feel EXHAUSTED and overwhelmed.
Now, I actually bet you do, too! How could you not? You have a BIG job and a newborn. No matter how much help you have — you still have an overly full plate.
So Marissa, we won’t think you’re being whiny or unprofessional if you fess up just a little. It’s not really “easy,” is it?
Work with us — show us some spit up you forgot to wipe off your blouse. Confess that you’re so tired some days you can barely get your heels on or that you wish you could wear sweats to work. Pull a diaper wipe out of your purse and swear you’ve learned how they can double as makeup wipes in a pinch.
You get it. Just let us in on the fact that you may be the CEO of a super exciting, fun company, but you’re also just one of us — a working mom juggling the super tough task of work and being a mom! We’d be cheering you on it if you did!
What do you think, HollywoodLifers? Tell me now.
— Bonnie Fuller
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