Tweet

Watch Pam’s killer performance, and the judges’ subsequent massacre, from the ‘Dancing with the Stars: All Stars’ premiere.

Once upon a time — Sept. 24, 2012, to be exact — there was a beautiful princess named Pamela Anderson. She danced the cha cha with passion and elegance, but her three wicked step-judges — Carrie Ann Inaba, Bruno Tonioli and Len Berman — reduced poor Princess Pam to tears, calling her names like “shaky” and “uncomfortable.” The saddest part about this fable, of course, is that it’s not a fable at all; It really happened on the season premiere of Dancing with the Stars: All Stars, and it was a tragedy.

Seriously, what crawled up these judges’ butts and died? Not only did Pam have the technique down, but as even Carrie Ann noted, she was “living the drama” in her performance. The fact that Pam received a score of 17, while Bristol Palin — who has all the sex appeal of a dead person — received a 19.5, is inexcusable. I don’t mean to cry “conspiracy,” but you know … CONSPIRACY! (Pam even pointed out that Bristol has “the whole Tea Party” voting for her, and I totally co-sign that theory.)

I get that this is the “all-star” season, and the celebs are being held to higher standards, but it was also the first night! Personally, I don’t even think anyone should be eliminated in week one. The stars should be allowed to get their feet wet in front of a live audience before having their dreams crushed for all the world to see.

Watch the judges slam Pam below, then vote: Did she really deserve such a low score?

Watch More ENTV Videos!

— Andy Swift

Follow @AndySwift

More Dancing with the Stars:

1. ‘Dancing With The Stars’ Recap: Sabrina Dances To One Direction
2. Sabrina Bryan Unveils Online ‘DWTS’ Fan Viewing Party
3. Maksim Chmerkovskiy Quits ‘DWTS’ After 15 Seasons