‘Here Comes Honey Boo Boo’ Recap: Alana Farts In Front Of Miss Georgia

Thu, September 20, 2012 1:03am EDT by 20 Comments
Honey Boo Boo Birthday
Courtesy of TLC

It’s party time as the family celebrates Alana’s birthday with a pool party BBQ! Read on for more details.

Well, my dear Here Comes Honey Boo Boo fans, we’re just one week away from the season finale! But before we can put this season of hilarity and horrors behind us, we have to celebrate Alana “Honey Boo Boo” Thompson‘s birthday!

Mama June Tries To Learn Makeup

Before we can get to Alana’s birthday festivities, we have to take care of business. Mama June Shannon informs us that there is one week until the last pageant of summer, and she’d like to learn how to do Alana’s hair and makeup, to save money. So it’s off to learn from Jennifer Garner. Yeah, that was her name. June tells the audience at home “I don’t wear no makeup, period,” in case people without eyes were tuning in. Mrs. Affleck tells June that she’ll tart up only half of Alana’s face, so June can try to replicate the look on the other side. We then learn that June can’t really see, at all, so, sure, attack your daughter’s eye with a pencil. Alana tells her mama, “I’m gonna look like I just got off the street walking,” which is true if that street was on the sun and half her face melted. Mission accomplished!

Mama June’s Favorite Sport Is Bingo

June takes the family to the VFW in Macon to play bingo for pageant money. This is when June informs us that “bingo is a sport” that she’s been playing since she was 10 years old. Learning about her ideas of what a sport is makes so much more sense out of her entire existence. Her Bingo face is the stuff of nightmares. “Mama plays bingo better than she cooks or cleans or anything,” one of the kids says, so there’s that. June has another sneezing attack on camera because no episode is complete without one. Is someone angling for a Claritin endorsement deal?

Alana Farts In Front Of Miss Georgia

Alana and June go to The Chic Boutique to meet Miss Georgia 2011, whom they met through a “friend of a friend,” which is a fancy way of saying “TLC arranged for this.” Alana asks Miss Georgia if she’s that tall in real life. Miss Georgia has no patience for this: “This is real life.” She also has no patience for Alana’s table manners: “That’s not cute, that’s not cute. Let’s not do that.” Alana responds to this the only way she knows how: she farts at the table. Miss Georgia tells her she has a gift for her, lighting up Alana’s sweet face. Upon hearing “I got you an official Miss Georgia headshot,” however, Alana’s all like, “Thanks a lot, cheapskate!” Or she should’ve, at least.

Party Time! AND: String Cheese Snot

It’s finally time for Alana’s seventh birthday party! Her sisters wrap up hot sauce, Pop Tarts, and soap for her because that’s what everyone wants to unwrap on their seventh birthday. Soap. The party looks really fun, with the new pool, a slip and slide, snow cone machine, and awesome water slide. June attempts to climb the water slide, gives up, and then orders an almond coconut snow cone — yuck. Alana tells us “This is my best birthday ever” and then the most horrific thing possible occurred. Alana sneezed and snotted out both nostrils. Seriously, it was like string cheese shot out of her face. When Alana sneezed, it was like time stood still. Watching her try to sniff it back in was equal parts hysterical, terrifying, and terrifically, terrifically sad. So, par for the course!

What did you think of tonight’s episode, HollywoodLifers? Did Alana’s sneeze have you running for the bathroom? Was Miss Georgia’s gift of a headshot just the worst? Most importantly, are you totally bummed that next week is the season finale? Let me know in the comments below!

– Billy Nilles

More Honey Boo Boo:

  1. Honey Boo Boo’s House Broken Into
  2. Honey Boo Boo’s Mama June Shannon: Bingo Is My Favorite Sport
  3. ‘SNL’ Spoofs Honey Boo Boo & Mama June Shannon

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Trixie

Posted at 5:41 AM on January 4, 2013  

SCUM FAMILY GETS ATTENTION. AMERICA IS GOING DOWNHILL WITH ENCOURAGING THIS ABHORRENT PSYCHOTIC BEHAVIOR.

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michelle Penny

Posted at 7:23 PM on September 27, 2012  

Please,someone take that poor tortured pig away from this family..

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Mark

Posted at 11:19 PM on September 26, 2012  

OMG I almost peed myself this show is hilarious I Live in Georgia also, some people have commented about “white trash” maybe those people should not watch the show I find them good ‘ol country folk

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lily

Posted at 11:27 PM on February 28, 2013  

I so agree with you!

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lisa

Posted at 3:40 PM on September 21, 2012  

i was thinking to myself get that child a kleenex for goodness sakes.

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Audrey

Posted at 12:52 PM on September 27, 2012  

and the mother needed one too

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Darlene Liveoak

Posted at 11:44 AM on September 21, 2012  

These people are real not like the Kardashians parading around like whores in a whore house. Honeys’ mom is coming from nothing and has a lot in common with Chris K. from all the different baby daddies. Chris K was nothing but a mans toy and who knows what she did illegal to get where shes at. Hats Off to June for being Real. Honey Boo will probably grow up to be the next Nancy Grace.

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Aisha

Posted at 11:38 AM on September 22, 2012  

@Darlene, so true!

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Audrey

Posted at 1:03 PM on September 27, 2012  

June is so nasty..sneezing ,then wiping her nose upward with her hand…great example for all those daughters..Alana swearing so freely at 7yrs old,,not cool..I pray they don’t waste more time on this show..we get it..they are all gross..poor baby Kaitlyn

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Carmen

Posted at 12:14 AM on September 21, 2012  

I was never a fan of “Toddlers and Tiaras,” but “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” makes for a great laugh. I missed the past episode, but have read about the encounter with Miss Georgia. My Hopper recorded this episode, and will record the finale. I have a ton of DVR recording space in case there is a reunion or some sort of “Honey Boo Boo” special. I can’t wait for my shift to end at Dish, and I can watch this as soon as I get home.

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PS

Posted at 6:16 PM on September 21, 2012  

Thanks, DishTV employee. We can tell that this is in no way a part of your job. You’re certainly a random poster who just happens to talk a lot about your DVR and DishTV!

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lauren

Posted at 10:13 PM on September 20, 2012  

How u gonna talk about a kid. U must have No self esteem! I think they are wrong for even air that sneeze. She is a child at the end of the day, why did no one help. That film crew disgusts me!

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NonYaDam

Posted at 12:31 PM on September 20, 2012  

Is this really what the world has come to? Watching white trash on television? If you are that bored with your life go outside and do something! I don’t belive that anyone should give them views! It puts money in their pocket for being disgusting, rude, and unhealthy!

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Heaven

Posted at 2:38 AM on September 20, 2012  

Such an ugly child… She is very over weight as well. Following in her moms footsteps. I cant even look at her mother without puking in my mouth. This family is all white trash

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kim buehler

Posted at 11:44 AM on September 21, 2012  

The show looks dumb.Everyone I’ve talked to says they cant believe that a tv station would waist there time on such filth.Makes me not even want to watch any shows an a and e’s other shows

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L.

Posted at 4:01 PM on September 21, 2012  

She’s actually a very cute little girl.

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sizzerzncombz (@sizzerzncombz)

Posted at 1:05 PM on September 27, 2012  

She’s just in the wrong family!

 
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Audrey

Posted at 12:55 PM on September 27, 2012  

I think she’s chubby,but very photogenic.now June she’s just a pig with no manners or self esteem…she is definitely a good example of white trash

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Sammie G.

Posted at 7:16 PM on November 1, 2012  

I can just say that u can probably be quite now! calling someones child ugly!!!! I mean come on you talk about them being the white trash!Obviously u are for even having the nerve to call someones child ugly and overweight!How would you like it if i said that about one of your children!! People amaze me.As a matter of fact she may not be the perfect barbie u think she should be but i think shes a pretty cute little girl with alot of confidence!

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lily

Posted at 11:29 PM on February 28, 2013  

B***H!!!!

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