'Game Of Thrones' Recap: A New Evil Is Born In Westeros

Sun, April 22, 2012 10:00pm EDT by 19 Comments

Spoiler alert: Stop reading if you haven’t watched the April 22 episode of ‘Game of Thrones!’

If your children ever ask you where babies come from, for the love of Westeros, don’t show them the final scene from this week’s Game of Thrones. Childbirth is gross enough as it is without the unholy image of Melisandre (Carice van Houten) screaming and pushing a full-grown shadow creature out of her priestess hoo-ha. I guess Stannis (Stephen Dillane) finally got that son he was hoping for, even if he does share partial paternity with the Lord of Light. I don’t envy whoever has to fill out that birth certificate.

Arya (Maisie Williams), Gendry (Joe Dempsie) and all their kidnapped pals were taken to a charming torture chamber this week, where one person was killed every day until they finally squealed about the location of “the Brotherhood.” And considering most of them have no idea what “the Brotherhood” even is, there were quite a few deaths by rats and fire — a combination you really have to see to believe.

And speaking of torture, how could I go this long without mentioning dear, sweet Joffrey (Jack Gleeson)? After ordering his men to beat and disrobe Sansa (Sophie Turner), he turned his sadistic sense of fun on two unsuspecting whores who had been purchased for his name day. Their time started out innocently enough, with Joffrey watching as one whore went to town on the other. But then came the spanking. And the belting. And before you knew it, Joffrey was ordering that one whore beat the other with a friggin’ sceptre. It was sick — but hey, so is Joffrey.

So how did the eldest of the Stark ladies fare this week? Weirdly, that’s how. Very weirdly. After Catelyn (Michelle Fairley) accused Petyr (Aidan Gillian) of betraying her by staging a meeting with Renley (Gethin Anthony), he countered with a confession of his love. And when that didn’t go over so well, he presented her with Ned’s remains — in a nice, neat little box. (For the record, when I said I wanted to see Sean Bean again, that’s not how I meant it!)

Catelyn and Renley also attempted to forge an alliance with Stannis, but he wasn’t having any of it. Not only did he refuse to “join” them, but he counter-offered for them to join him, with the promise of making Renley his heir — that is, until his creepy shadow child is old enough to assume the crown. (Can it even wear a crown? It’s made of shadows!)

Meanwhile, Daenerys’ (Emilia Clarke) luck improved this week when she and her band of Dothraki ragamuffins — whom shall hence be known as simply “Dothragamuffins” — were permitted access into Qarth, “the greatest city that ever was or will be.” Of course, it took some convincing. Daenerys was initially turned away after she refused to give the Thirteen a peek at her wee dragon babies, but after she threatened to basically kill all of them with their magical fire breath, one member of the city’s guard stepped forward and argued their case.

Call me crazy, but Qarth seems a little too good to be true. #PrayForTheDragonBabies.

FINAL DEATH COUNT: At least 3 (plus tons of Lannister casualties)

FINAL BOOB COUNT: 6

OK, what did you think of this week’s episode? Has Daenerys finally caught a break? Will Joffrey ever die? And, honestly, was that birth scene not the creepiest thing you’ve seen on TV all season? Hit up the comments section with your thoughts!

— Andy Swift

More Game of Thrones recaps:

  1. Recap: A Spy Is Found At King’s Landing
  2. Recap: Melisandre’s Evil Plan Is Revealed
  3. Season Premiere Recap: Stannis Reveals Joffrey’s Paternity

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Posted at 1:48 PM on May 26, 2012  

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Posted at 7:04 AM on May 17, 2012  

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Lisa

Posted at 3:08 PM on April 23, 2012  

Um wow the scene with Joffrey was pure terror I don’t think there has ever been a more evil villian but I’m sorry I have to wonder about the actor tho? I mean did playing this role introduce jack Gleeson to stuff he never would have known about or thought about ? That worries me have we gone too far we look to these young actors to entertain us but a what cost??? I mean a scene like that is just so evil and twisted I can’t imagine it didn’t confuse that young actor he was in a room with naked girls?

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anonymous

Posted at 3:08 AM on May 7, 2012  

Jack Gleeson is 18 years old I’m sure he’ll be ok

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ginny

Posted at 11:25 PM on April 22, 2012  

its been awhile since i read the books- so bear with me. Did Stannis and Melisandre have sex in the book? and is that how she was able to give birth to the “shadow baby”
or is that something they added for the series? it was pretty bomb tho.

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Rio

Posted at 9:19 AM on April 23, 2012  

yes they did have sex, it never happened ”’on screen”’ but it was implied several times (like in the melisandre POV)

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Raves

Posted at 1:15 AM on April 24, 2012  

They did have sex, and they did have it on screen. In the episode before this he threw her on a table and they had sex and we saw it. Not sure where you were when that scene was happening, but it did happen. What I want to know is, did her pregnancy speed up because it was a devil baby, or did 9 months actually pass. And if time did speed up, wouldn’t Stannis wonder how she could deliver a baby before 9 months?

 
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Jennifer

Posted at 3:43 PM on April 25, 2012  

I think Rio meant in the book the sex was implied but not actually depicted since his/her comment was in reply to a question about the book.

 
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Andy Swift

Posted at 11:43 AM on April 23, 2012  

Yeah, I guess the sex scene on the show was a pretty big liberty they took. But it really helped to set the stage for their creepy shadow baby.

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hanna

Posted at 1:20 PM on April 23, 2012  

even though the sex DOES HAPPEN in the books (just that we don’t actually read the sex scenes) I think they had to include them on the show so that ppl who don’t read the books understand better where the hell the shadow babies come from!

 
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Jenny

Posted at 11:04 PM on April 22, 2012  

hey just because Gendry and Arya don’t know about The Brotherhood it doesn’t mean the others one didn’t! i’m glad that thing didn’t go unnoticed among all the deaths and boobs hahaha

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Andy Swift

Posted at 11:19 PM on April 22, 2012  

:) I will NEVER miscount the deaths and boobs.

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Ana Paula

Posted at 11:00 PM on April 22, 2012  

The first season was great, and was very good at taking us through all the power status and struggles. Not having read the books myself and not being a fan of fantasy lore (i’v never been able to sit through an entire LOTR, for example) i was amazed at how i kept up with the names, ranks, territories, tribes and lords. The wolves and the baby dragons were nice, I work in CG and appreciated the dragons all the more. But i dont know what to make of that shadow birth. Is the story going to become so way out wierd and unrealistic that they can come up with a shadow baby and that is ok? What is next?
I do adore the Imp. His amazing wit and intelligence will keep me coming back for more for a while.

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Dave

Posted at 11:07 PM on April 22, 2012  

I am halfway through the second book. I love the intrigue of the story. I greatly respect George R. Martin and I do nothing but compliment his writing style and prose. But it seems when he introduces his concepts of “magic” that it cheapens the story. This shadow child thing is a symptom of that. Also, there are some spoilers I’ve read which leave me almost dreading reading those portions.

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Jenny

Posted at 11:09 PM on April 22, 2012  

…………………. so dragons and white walkers who rise from the death are ok and realistic? i’m sorry but your whole comment is just off I mean you said it yourself its FANTASY. so yes, there are ‘magic creatures’ and stuff!!
if you’re watching this kind of show it’s silly to be talking about realistic and unrealistic stuff it’s a fantasy world!

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Andy Swift

Posted at 11:19 PM on April 22, 2012  

Ever since those dragons hatched, I’ve stopped expecting anything to be realistic.

 
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Skye

Posted at 12:55 AM on April 23, 2012  

Best comment on here, that’s what this show is…

 
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Andy Swift

Posted at 11:21 PM on April 22, 2012  

I loved the final scene because of how weird it was, but I agree with you, the show has taken a VERY different turn in season two. I’ll be curious to see what else it has in store for us.

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Rio

Posted at 9:22 AM on April 23, 2012  

oh come on it wasn’t THAT BAD!! and I completely disagree with Dave, I love GRRM’s ‘magic’ the children of the forest are one of the most wonderful things i’ve read on the series, just like the wolf-dreams and skin-changing, if you’re not up to a little fantasy and magic in a FANTASY series, just don’t buy the book!

 
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