Plus, Jack made another major play for Emily this week. Was his speech enough to sway you from Team Daniel?
The Empress of White Girl Problems, Emily Thorne (Emily VanCamp), has been revenge-ing her way up and down the Hamptons all season without breaking a sweat — but she and her impeccably dressed sidekick Nolan (Gabriel Mann) became aware of a powerful enemy in Frank (Max Martini) on the Oct. 26 episode of Revenge. And I’m talking lurks-in-the-bushes powerful.
Of course, Frank isn’t without a few enemies of his own. Victoria’s (Madeleine Stowe) super-faithful hubby Conrad (Henry Czerny) snuck a peek at the hidden camera footage from Lydia’s (Amber Valletta) apartment, and now he’s convinced Frank is too dangerous to be trusted. If only he knew his wife was the one who orchestrated his attack — and that they totally eye-humped each other in the kitchen earlier in the evening. Whatever, I ship it.
(Side note: How is Lydia still alive?! I can understand if she just fell off a building, but that insane skank landed on top of a CAR! Either she shares Sammy the Wonder Dog’s powers of immortality, or she’s the luckiest adulteress ever.)
Emily’s love life took another complicated turn this week as Jack (Nick Wechsler) attempted to seduce her with a well-crafted, metaphor-laced speech about sailing. But like myself, Emily remains an unwavering member of Team Daniel (Joshua Bowman.)
And speaking of Daniel, you’ve really got to pity the guy. Not only does he get shot at the end of the summer — oh relax, people, it was in the pilot — but his good buddy Tyler (Ashton Holmes) drugged him on his first night working at the bar. Crazy-pants then proceeded to bang his head on a pole and blame Tyler for the injuries. Whatever that creeper has up his sleeve, Emily better whip out her Red Sharpie of Death and nip it in the bud. Pronto.
Lastly, I’d like to give kudos to Ashley (Ashley Madekwe) for being the first person on this show to ever point out how old Sam the Wonder Dog must be. She may not have given his exact age, but she did refer to him as “that old dog.” And, honestly, that’s good enough for me.
And now, for the question that must be asked every week…