This recap is brought to you by Ritalin, the preferred drug of choice for college dropouts recording their first EP.
Of all the lessons I learned from watching the Oct. 4 episode of 90210, the most valuable was how Liam (Matt Lanter) was able to turn a bar commercial into a Guys Gone Wild shoot in three easy steps: (1) Spill beer (2) Remove shirt (3) Add wind! And I’m glad business picked up, because if pregnant Jane (Kristina Apgar) spent one more day crying in that empty bar, they’d have to rename it “Tears and Beers.”
Naomi (AnnaLynne McCord) also learned an important lessons this week: Never trust a cowboy. It turns out Austin (Justin Deeley) was using her to free himself from Holly (Megalyn Echikunwoke), who he was apparently hooking up with. So when her nerd-in-shining-armor Max (Josh Zuckerman) told her he transfered to Caltech to be closer to her, choosing him over Austin — who “tastes like hay,” apparently — was a no-brainer. Naomi will continue to occasionally make out with Austin in her kitchen, but she’s definitely dating Max. I think. Possibly.
Annie (Shenae Grimes) helped sabotage Holly’s (Megalyn Echikunwoke) sorority in the final game, but her victory was short-lived. She was kicked out of the house, and it took about five minutes for her to ask her friend if that whole “escorting” business was still an option. Honestly, sometimes you just gotta throw up your hands and give in to prostitution when it’s the only sensible option. Get it, Annie.
Speaking of the hot mess Wilson family, Dixon’s (Tristan Wilds) nasty little pill addiction took a turn for the awesome this week. After discovering he was fresh out of the good stuff — and really, there is no sketchier place to pop pills than an empty stairwell — he hit up a Charice look-alike on the beach for a little seaside drug deal.
Come to think of it, I’m not entirely sure it wasn’t Charice’s Glee alter ego, Sunshine Corazon. She clearly transferred schools:
And in “I totally called it last week” news, Adrianna (Jessica Lowndes) made a new friend — who turned out to be none other than Jane’s presumed-dead husband! Seriously, the next time I tell you all that someone is going to rise from the sea, you’d better believe me.
What did you think of tonight’s episode? Which guy should Naomi choose? And how excited are you for an epic Dixon breakdown? Drop some comments!