’90210′ returned Sept. 12 with a bang — well, more like a bong. Let’s dissect the big premiere, shall we?
Remember all those really interesting, juicy plot twists that came about at the end of 90210‘s third season — like Naomi (AnnaLynne McCord) being pregnant and Annie (Shenae Grimes) inheriting a butt-load of money? I hope you weren’t as into them as I was, because the fourth season premiere pretty much wiped the whole slate clean.
For starters, Annie lost out on her inheritance and had to defer from Carnegie Mellon for a semester. This led her to the hallowed halls of California University — and straight into the arms of Jeremy (Matt Cohen.)
Liam (Matt Lanter) returned from his big fishing expedition, but after Annie turned down TWO of his proposals, her knight in shining side-swept bangs got fed up with her. He sauntered over to a nearby beach bar, got drunk and ended up buying the place for $25,000. (Looks like we’ve got ourselves a new Peach Pit!)
Desperate to get to the top of the CU food chain, Naomi — who is not pregnant — bought herself a big-ass mansion to throw parties at. The downside? Her new pad came equipped with a pot-bellied pig and a smart-mouth cowboy named Austin (Justin Deeley) who also served as the resident pot-grower.
And speaking of random house guests, Navid’s (Michael Steger) little sister decided to stay in Beverly Hills to finish out her senior year — their mom moved to Switzerland, joining the rest of the show’s parents in whatever black hole they’ve disappeared into — so she’ll be shacking up with them at Silver’s (Jessica Stroup) house this season.
OK, back to Naomi! Her little coming out party started off great — bonfires, shirtless valet workers, etc. — but it quickly went up in flames. Literally. When the cops showed up to bust her for a noise complaint, she tossed Austin’s pot into the bonfire to hide it from them. You can probably guess what happened next: The feds cuffed her and carted her off to jail. Plus, everybody at the party got super-duper high.
But wait, I saved the best (aka most bat-s**t) for last! Everyone’s favorite pill-meddling psychopath Adrianna (Jessica Lowndes) showed up to Naomi’s party and got quite the tongue lashing from our girl Silver. It was something to the effect of “You’re dead to me,” which reminded me of her little tiff with Naomi back in season one. Austin, however, wasn’t quite through with Adrianna. He lent her a sympathetic ear, which obviously led to a sympathetic shirt to wear the morning after.
Ladies and gentlemen, the bitch is back.
OK, your turn to babble: Are you bummed that Naomi isn’t pregnant? Do you think Annie made a mistake turning down Liam’s proposal? And am I the only one waiting for Adrianna to do something crazy? Drop a comment with your thoughts on tonight’s premiere!