Is it smart to get a sneak preview of forever?
Ashley Hebert and J.P. Rosenbaum may have gotten engaged this season on The Bachelorette, but taking their relationship from TV to reality is a whole lot harder than it looks. The two are currently searching for their NYC love nest so that they can be together and live in the same city before their wedding. Are they making a smart choice by shacking up before saying ‘I do’ — and would you be if you did the same?
The dental assistant and her 34-year-old fiance don’t seem to know everything about the other’s living habits yet, if a recent tweet is any indication. “@JP_Rosenbaum is going to kill me when he sees how much clothing I have!! #newyorkaptsneedmoreclosetspace,” the 24-year-old wrote on Twitter Aug. 18.
J.P. seems to have come to terms with the fact that he’ll have to ditch his bachelor pad for a much larger space. “@ashhebert all I can say is thank god we r getting a bigger place!” he tweeted back.
This simply shows that there are always going to be things you don’t know about your husband-to-be or boyfriend, and that you may not like what you see when you do move in together. That said, this is the smartest idea possible if you’re uncertain as to whether he’s really ‘the one.’
Just think how lucky you’ll be to have a trial run! What if there are things about him that you truly can’t stand — dealbreakers — like him leaving his toenail clippings around the house, or refusing to shower more than once every six days? You can’t really know everything about him until you see him in his natural habitat, and he sees you in yours.
Although Ashley and J.P. are doing so out of necessity, as she’s currently in Pennsylvania and he’s over two hours away in New York City, they’re making the right decision. Especially for a couple that’s had a somewhat fantasy relationship of romantic vacations, televised audiences and quick, passionate trips to see one another, moving in pre-marriage is just plain smart.
Don’t be old-fashioned: this is the rest of your life we’re talking about.