Emily- Brad Womack failed as a potential husband for two key reasons: he had a nasty temper and he wasn’t ready to be a parent to your daughter; Ricki, 6.
I have to applaud you Emily for having the maturity to put the best interests of your daughter AND yourself, ahead of some fantasy romance that you may have been longing for with Bachelor Brad.
Even though you’re only 25 and Brad is 38, you were the real adult in your reality- TV created relationship. You clearly were forced to grow up after losing your fiance, Ricky Hendrick, when you were pregnant and then having to raise your daughter, as a single mom.
Brad, on the other hand, is not yet at the age of 38 ready to take on the responsibility of becoming a full-time dad. “He didn’t understand why I couldn’t go on a random vacation the next day,” you told People magazine in their new issue. “It’s hard for me to say, ‘I’m so tired, I want to go to bed at 8′ and for him to inderstand.”
His disinterest in parenting would have been reason to walk away from a wedding with Brad ! “What he was doing was the definition of NOT ready to co-parent,” says relationship expert Cooper Lawrence, co-host of Scott and Todd on TLJ.
“Emily really needs to be congratulated on her maturity and her parenting. She was looking out for her child,” agrees psychotherapist, Dr Gilda Carle, author of Don’t Bet on the Prince!
Secondly Emily- you were smart to realize that Brad’s self-admitted bad temper, would ruin any chance you’d have of a happy marriage.
“He acted like a little boy who was totally out of control,” says Dr. Carle, about Brad’s confession that “I would get so angry and would feel violated. I would keep those feelings bottled up, and by the time I had the chance to speak to Em… I would let that negative emotion come flooding out, and it was almost as if she was being attacked;” he confessed.
Listen Emily, if Brad had been mature he would have known how to handle his anger in a constructive way by talking things out instead of blowing up at you. And if you and Brad had shared your mutual frustration about being in the public eye, it could have strengthened your bond, points out Dr. Carle.
Apparently Brad grew up with an angry stepfather , says his stepsister Sandra. He seems to be repeating the bad behavior of his stepdad and he needs serious therapy to overcome this.
“He needs anger management therapy,” says Dr. Carle, “or he’ll continue having anger within him whenever things don’t go his away and this will affect all his relationships.”
So the question is- why did you, Emily, fall for this guy in the first place?
“He became a prize and when you’re not in your real world with your jobs, family, and friends, you’re just living in a fantasy world,” explains Cooper Lawrence. “When Emily got back to the real world, she realized he didn’t have the qualities to be a parent and she realized – geez-what was I thinking?”
Well Emily- don’t beat yourself up. We can all get caught up in a romantic fantasy and as a single mom who lost your fiance in a tragic accident, I can totally understand why you’d be ready for a wonderful romance and happily-ever-after-marriage. You deserve that.
But you are very wise to realize that your happily -ever -after will be with a more mature man who will love your daughter! And let’s all hope, Brad gets the help he needs.
jason
Posted at 7:40 PM on June 29, 2011
Uh…Bonnie, Emily doesn’t read this joke of a blog. I think you just wasted a lot of time writing a personal letter to her.