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Mom-To-Be Alexandra Says: I Got Groped At The Airport, And I Asked For It!

Thu, May 19, 2011 5:13pm EDT by 1 Comment

Just when I thought it was time to relax on my last vacation before baby, in came the dreaded airport security frisking! Pregnancy pat down? Yeah, not my cup of tea.

While I was only at liberty to take the occasional nap at work once during the day — and by nap I mean the two minutes I closed my eyes in the cold bathroom stall, placing my head on 1-ply toilet paper roll only to imagine it was a down pillow — my husband and I decided it was time to take a little vacation. If only to get away for a few days: a little “babymoon.”

I must say the actual vacation itself was quite relaxing and a great way to reconnect before the baby arrived, and I would recommend it to any couple. But getting to and from this destination was another story all together: the dreaded security checkpoint.

Though the latest X-ray scanners at the airport have been said to use low intensity radiation, I opted instead for the controversial physical “pat down.” I figured the long term damage of being groped by a TSA officer would be far less than the radiation received from the machine.

Once I asked for the “pat down,” an air of annoyance was immediately perceived from the female officer, as she asked if I would like to go to a private area.  “No thank you,” I replied respectively, while in my head I was thinking “Oh hell no!!  If I am going to be inappropriately fondled, I want witnesses!”

While I was being publicly frisked, I watched as my husband threw his arms up in the air as instructed in the machine, as if waiting to be read his Miranda rights.

Ahhh! Between toilet paper pillow naps and unnecessary fondling at the airport, I just couldn’t wait to put my bikini on and show off my beach baby bump!

If you were pregnant, would you choose the X-ray scanner or the pat down on your next flight?

–Alexandra Osipow

Get more of my blog!

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  5. Alexandra Says: I’m Determined To Look Pregna-Chic!