Should You Move Cross-Country For Your Man Like Emily Is Doing For Brad? Especially If You Have A Child?

Thu, March 31, 2011 10:10am EST by 4 Comments

Professional matchmaker and dating coach Matt Titus and his wife, author and media personality Tamsen Fadal, tell you whether it’s the right time for Emily to be moving to Austin for Brad! asked  the Love Consultants Matt Titus and Tamsen Fadal, to weigh in on whether Brad Womack and Emily Maynard are moving too quickly with their plans for Emily and her daughter Ricki to move to Brad’s hometown for the summer!

Matt’s Take:

When The Bachelor finale ended, Brad Womack and his “choice” for a true love, Emily Maynard asked for privacy to build their new relationship yet they are now parading their every move in the glare of the public eye. What changed the minds of these two once secretive lovebirds? Why are Brad and Emily suddenly so open about their romance? The latest news is that Emily is getting ready to make the big move and planning to uproot her life, which includes her 5-year-old daughter, Ricki, and she’ll journey to Austin to be with Brad.

Once again it seems to me like they aren’t putting too much thought about the child’s feelings in all of this frantic push for more exposure. They haven’t stopped pushing their relationship for a second, and it seems to be going overboard now-  first the endless Twitter updates about last weekend, now suddenly we learn Texas- shy Emily is backing up the U-Haul and zooming to the Lone Star State! The more they push, the more desperate and false it feels and smells to my expert mind.

And it’s even more wrong with a child thrown into the mix! Little Ricki goes to school in Charlotte, and her grandparents live close by, yet Emily, ever in selfish-mode, is ripping up stakes and forcing a new, potentially unwanted reality on her own daughter just to be close to “her man.” While I think it’s very important that they bond as a collective unit if it‘s ever going to work, it needs to be done in stages and in a realistic and private manner, not in a showbiz shotgun manner, fueled by the bright lights of eager paparazzi and a woefully misguided fan base. That’s right –  these two met on a television set people! A VERY popular reality television show that’s very goal is to create and showcase the thrill of impossible romance!

Who will assist Emily with making the transition once she arrives? Brad? He‘s a busy business owner and that’s one of the very reasons he said he‘d never leave Austin. What kind of support will there be in Austin for Emily and Ricki? The emotions involved in a major move are difficult enough without dealing with all the burdens of sudden fame with it too, so  don’t even get me started on how stressful this will be for the child.

These two reality tv made partners need to seriously slow down and consider every practicality – including what will happen if things didn’t work out. Hey Brad and Emily, take a breath and start acting like adults, shun the spotlight for 24 hours and most of all, THINK ABOUT RICKI!

Tamsen’s Take:

Millions of viewers tuned in to see Brad Womack get down on one knee and propose to single mom Emily Maynard in a South African vineyard .It was totally a fairy tale come true, but now, after the credits have rolled, it’s real life, are they adjusting to that fact? I’m not so sure, because every day I hear something else that raises a big red flag to expose just how haphazard this romance is progressing.

Word is Emily Maynard is heading to Austin, Texas to be closer to her Bachelor mate, Brad Womack That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but uprooting her daughter Emily to do it, is in my book. As a matter of fact, I can’t help but feel that the timing of the news of Emily moving to Austin sounds less like an organic announcement and more like an, “I’m going to prove people wrong about Brad and I“ type of press stunt. Just last week there were headlines stating that these two were already broken up!

Even without them being in the spotlight, this is a very complicated situation. If any person wants to move to be closer to a romantic partner, they have the choice to move, but they shouldn’t do it solely for the sake of the relationship. Both people have to be clear about their feelings, and to know in advance that the move isn’t suddenly going to change everything and make it perfect. What if after Emily uproots her child and things don’t work out with this Brad? I think at this point it’s more important to put the well-being of her daughter first. They are still in the early days of their romance.

I don’t believe Brad and Emily are considering the hard reality of what this move will entail beyond their current rush of very public affection. It is a huge experience for a 5 year- old to be uprooted from her family, her friends, her school and the security of her current environment. When will reality play a role in the manufactured fantasy of the perfect relationship that seems to be driving them? I hope it shows up sooner, rather than later…for Ricki’s sake.

Check Out!

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