LAURA'S LOVE LIFE ADVICE: Should You Ever Feel 'Stupid' For Crushing On A Guy Friend Like Snooki Does With Vinny?

Fri, March 4, 2011 11:45am EST by Add first Comment

Snooki has a thing for her Jersey Shore castmate — who also happens to be her roommate! Is this a bad situation in the making?

Girl falls for boy. Boy does not reciprocate. This scenario has all the makings for some prime TV viewing, doesn’t it? Well, this actually happened on a reality TV show — The Jersey Shore — when Nicole ‘Snooki’ Polizzi drunkenly confessed her love to roommate and pal Vinny Guadagnino. Yikes! So what should you do if you fall for a friend?

Snooki, unfortunately, let out some drunken truth during a rowdy club outing when she declared her love for her so-called “Big Brother”, leading her BFF, Jenni “JWoww” Farley to ask an actual intelligent romantic question. “Do you have feelings for him, or are you drunk?” she wonders.

Snooki‘s response? “I’m embarrassed. F–k my life. I like him, but it’s not a good look for me to start to have feelings for him and then he’s bringing home all these girls. He tells me he’s not going to bring anyone home so we can cuddle and then he brings somebody home. It just makes me look stupid.”

Having feelings for a male buddy isn’t stupid, but declaring them in a public forum when you aren’t sure how he feels sure is! You have to tread lightly when you fall for a guy friend. For starters, you need to assess how good a friend he is, and if ruining the friendship is worth it. In most situations, you’re going to have one of two outcomes. One, you’ll start dating your pal (this is your ‘in a perfect world’ scenario’). Two, he’ll feel so awkward around you that he’ll tell all his guy friends about your crush, making you feel awkward. It’s a big-time gamble, and depending on how close you are, you might have a lot to lose.

Snooki already has all the information she needs about Vinny. He’s cuddling with her, but bringing other girls home. Re: he doesn’t want to get serious with anyone. If she had been content to let things go on the way they were, the two could have had a nice, non-emotional friends with benefits relationship.

However, if you want more from a guy friend, you can’t sleep with him or cuddle with him knowing he’s seeing other people. You’ll never get the result that you want, and you’ll just become another one of his hookups — which is definitely not what you want.

However, and I will stand by this, guy friends do make the best boyfriends. You know where they’ve been, you know their tricky ways and they should have more respect for you than the average woman, because they know and trust you. So, bottom line: is Snooki stupid for crushing on Vinny? If he had better a better, more decent man, then no. But he’s a womanizer who doesn’t want to settle down anytime soon — and because Snooki wouldn’t admit that to herself, she got hurt.

Remember, you can’t change a man — so don’t even try.

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