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Charlie Sheen's Curses & Insults That Ended 'Two And A Half Men!' Has He Totally Lost It?

Fri, February 25, 2011 6:45pm EDT by William Earl 22 Comments
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Charlie’s rants might cost him his career and every shred of dignity he has left — but the crazy keeps on coming!

Charlie Sheen‘s erratic behavior caused this season of Two and a Half Men to go dark on Feb. 24, mostly due to the super-troubled star’s epic rants. The ball started rolling yesterday when Charlie went nuts on a Feb. 24 radio interview on The Alex Jones Show, dropping a ton of insults to the show’s creators and inspiring CBS to issue the following statement: “Based on the totality of Charlie Sheen’s statements, conduct and condition, CBS and Warner Bros. Television have decided to discontinue production of Two and a Half Men for the remainder of the season.” But what did Charlie say that made CBS so worried?

We chose our our favorite crazy moments from the interview, which likely inspired the network and production company to panic:

  • “I’m so tired of pretending like my life isn’t perfect and bitchin’ and just winning every second. I’m not perfect, and bitching and just delivering the goods at every f—ing turn. Because look what I’m dealing with, man — I’m dealing with fools and trolls. I’m dealing with soft targets.”
  • “If you’re part of my family, I will love you violently. If you infiltrate and try to hurt my family, I will murder you violently.”
  • “I’m sorry, man, but I’ve got magic. I’ve got poetry in my fingertips. Most of the time — and this includes naps — I’m an F-18, bro. And I will destroy you in the air. I will deploy my ordinance to the ground.”

Furthermore, we’ve rounded up the latest updates in this rapidly developing story. While reading them, just try to imagine the panic Sheen’s handlers must be going through right about now.

  • Charlie wrote an open letter to TMZ, calling Two and a Half Men creator Chuck Lorre a “contaminated little maggot [who] can’t handle my power and can’t handle the truth.” Fair enough.
  • Charlie accepted a challenge from to take a drug test on Feb. 28 to prove his sobriety, saying  “These a–holes [at CBS] claim they know [I am on drugs] and we are going to prove them wrong. That’s how confident I am.” Sounds good.
  • Charlie claims he’s in negotiations to star in an HBO show called Sheen’s Corner. “It will be epic, all types of guests and we will focus on the truth and the absurd,” Charlie says. Half of that sounds right.
  • Charlie was once again compared to Lindsay Lohan by Hollywood insiders. Although he’s shown interest in reviving his iconic Major League role, Morgan Creek Pictures CEO James G. Robinson said, “Obviously with Major League 3 there’s a huge part written for Charlie’s character … but after dealing with Lindsay Lohan on Georgia Rule, I can speak for someone who has experienced the difficulties of working with an actor dealing with addiction.”
  • Charlie texted Good Morning America that he will be on the set of Two and a Half Men despite the show’s production being canceled.
  • Charlie brushed off anti-semitic accusations when referring to Chuck by his Hebrew name Chaim Levine. “I was referring to Chuck by his real name, because I wanted to address the man, not the bulls–t TV persona,” he tells TMZ. But spoke with Abraham H. Foxman, the National Director of the Anti-Defamation League, who disagreed: “By invoking television producer Chuck Lorre’s Jewish name in the context of an angry tirade against him, Charlie Sheen left the impression that another reason for his dislike of Mr. Lorre is his Jewishness.  This fact has no relevance to Mr. Sheen’s complaint or disagreement, and his words are at best bizarre, and at worst, borderline anti-Semitism.”
  • When speaking with his buddy Pat O’Brien on Loose Cannons, Charlie colorfully explained how he’s undervalued by the show’s production staff: “I put a billion dollars in the studio’s pockets and I put half a billion dollars in Chuck’s pocket. I should of been walking in to sandwiches, massages and h–d jobs. Yeah, I said it!”

We hope Charlie finds help for his problems, but we also await his next rant with a morbid curiosity!

Charlie Sheen Brings His Crazy To Primetime In A Tell-All Interview!

Charlie Sheen To CBS: ‘We’re At War — Apologize While Licking My Feet!’

— William Earl