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LAURA'S LOVE ADVICE: How To Handle Hearing Your Ex Has Gotten Engaged, Like Sandra Bullock Was Forced To Do

Fri, January 21, 2011 10:48am EDT by 1 Comment, Getty Images, Getty Images

Jesse James and Kat Von D are engaged — and the ink on his divorce papers are barely dry! How should Sandy handle this staggering act of betrayal?

That snake Jesse James has done it again! After getting caught cheating with a variety of low-rent ‘ladies’ right after wife Sandra Bullock won her first Academy Award, West Coast Choppers CEO is now engaged to new girlfriend Kat Von D — just seven months after his divorce was finalized. Now that the world is watching for her reaction, what should Sandy say and do?

First of all, may I express my fervent desire that there are very few men in the world that resemble Jesse in character? “You know, sometimes the public gets it wrong. This is one of those times. 2010 was actually the best year of my life because I fell in love with my best friend. An amazing woman who stood behind me when the world turned their backs,” he told People magazine, rubbing salt in Sandra’s wound by adding, “My love for her is beyond description. So honored that she said ‘yes.’ Growing old with her is going to be a a f—in’ blast!”

2010 was the best year of your life, Jesse? Really? Because getting caught cheating on the woman who was too good for you, losing your adopted son and begging her to come back in vain really sounds like a blast. At this point, I sincerely hope Sandra feels nothing for the man — no lingering sadness at the ‘what if’ of their relationship — but utter revulsion.

Still, in the wake of such blatant betrayal, the world WILL be watching to see what she’ll do. But if Sandra can come back from a cheating scandal in the midst of her big moment (because nothing really tops winning an Oscar when you’ve been an actress as long as Sandy has), then she can certainly handle this.

What Sandra DID do: she stepped out in public with son Louis Bardo looking fabulous with her head held high. When she was asked to give a statement about the impending marriage, she refused. Her lack of a comment was actually brilliant: she’s telling the world ‘Louis is the only man I need and I have more important things to worry about than my stupid ex-husband. I’m a MOTHER now.”

But what should YOU do in a similar situation? Clearly a ‘no comment’ won’t work if you’re not in the public eye. A similar nonchalant, who-cares attitude will go a long way, though. It’s no use crying over spilt milk or a closed chapter (in public, at least). If a mutual friend asks if you’ve heard the news and how you’re doing, simply channel Sandra and act like you don’t care. “I’ve heard, good for him,” will do. Or say: “Everyone deserves to be happy!” and quickly change the topic. Don’t show any emotion whatsoever, or any indication that you might be hurting — it isn’t worth giving your ex that satisfaction.

For the record, I’m on board with Sandra‘s “no comment” answer — but I seriously hope she has a punching bag in the shape of Jesse’s head at home.


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