Our Reporter RUSS SAYS: ‘Piranha 3D’ Is A Campy Masterpiece Of A Movie!

Thu, August 19, 2010 5:07pm EDT by 9 Comments
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My prediction: If you have an ounce of fun in your body, you will love this movie about killer piranhas that overtake a town of hotties — in 3D!

The best thing about going to the movies is that you can submerge yourself in fantasy life. You don’t ALWAYS want a hard, cold dose of reality. If you agree with me, then you’ll run to the theatre to see the over-the-top comedic romp Piranha 3D this weekend!

In Piranha 3D it’s spring break time for Jerry O’Connell, Jessica Szohr, Vampire Diaries star Steve McQueen, Kelly Brook and porn star Riley Steele in the sleepy town of Lake Victoria – but this year isn’t all about boobs and booze. Nope, this year sucks. An underwater tremor sets thousands of flesh-eating piranhas. Sounds plausible right? Ha! But who cares?

You’ll remember this film for its campy gore and girl-on-girl make-out scenes. What else do you really need?

So what’s that noise you heard? It should be the sound of your credit card flying out of your pocket to buy multiple tickets for this film. I’m already cuing up to get back into the theatre, and here’s why…

* Jerry O’Connell. His turn as a Joe Francis-type porn king is comedic gold!

* Naked girls. I’m a guy. I’m human and this film delivers over and over and over again. My former teenage self had about 10 heart attacks!

* Campy gore galore! I couldn’t help but laugh at the cheesy 3D-inspired death scenes!

* Jessica Szohr. I have waited for this moment forever – the gorgeous Gossip Girl kisses another girl! God bless her!

* Christopher Lloyd. Back to the Future’s own Doc Brown provides the best cameo of the year as crazy piranha expert Mr. Goodman. Don’t believe me? The theater even gave him a standing ovation!

* The best death scene EVER! No spoilers here! It’s awesome and terrifying. Close your eyes, men. Let the ladies watch for you!

IN SUMMARY

Will you enjoy Piranha 3D? If you’re cheeky and fun, then I say yes – four out of five killer piranhas for sure!

Russ Weakland

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Icon Dean

Posted at 10:08 AM on August 20, 2010  

I will see it Russ knows best!

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codemonkey2003

Posted at 8:34 AM on August 20, 2010  

Is this going to be the Jaws of this generation?

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jenny

Posted at 1:05 AM on August 20, 2010  

I will totally see this movie now, thats what I call a movie review!!

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Matt

Posted at 6:12 PM on August 19, 2010  

Chicks making out is always awesome. Jerry O’Connell is equally awesome. Hope his new show The Defenders is as awesome as naked chicks.

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Trika

Posted at 6:01 PM on August 19, 2010  

You may have changed my mind about watching this movie, Russ. Sounds like a classic horror! Good job!

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Russ Weakland

Posted at 5:56 PM on August 19, 2010  

Prepare for an awesome time at the theater, make sure you have plenty of Sweedish Fish!

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Chris Keefe

Posted at 5:40 PM on August 19, 2010  

Now I have to see the movie! Thanks for the review…it helped! Great site!

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corina

Posted at 5:39 PM on August 19, 2010  

hm…think i’ll take your word for it on this one, russ :)

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Sean

Posted at 5:34 PM on August 19, 2010  

I’ll be going! Can’t wait to see some hot ladies getting eaten by fish!

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